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FMLs submitted from United States

Today, I needed to buy Vagisil. I went to the grocery store so I could use the self check-out. My item rung up incorrectly, so a girl came to help. She was new and having trouble, so she called more people to help. I ended up having five people around me talking about my Vagisil purchase. FML

#4186379
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44956) - you deserved it (3993)

On 07/31/2009 at 5:05pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, there was a 10-minute cloudburst. It started 30 seconds after I parked my car and ended 30 seconds after I arrived at the office. Now the sun is shining, the sky is blue, and I look like I took a shower fully clothed. Oh, and I'm wearing thin white pants. FML

#4181864
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40659) - you deserved it (7161)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:21pm - misc - by Soaked (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting on the train and some crazy man started talking to me. I ignored him, and he tapped on my shoulder. He started blabbing and I just pointed to my ears and mouthed "I'm deaf." He stopped talking. A minute later my phone rang and I answered it without thinking. FML

#4181466
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8231) - you deserved it (68590)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I gave my wife of four years a special anniversary gift: a red rose dipped in liquid gold so that she would cherish and admire it forever. She told me it was too "Italian" looking. I now have a hundred dollar rose sitting in my office. FML

#4180457
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50499) - you deserved it (5754)

On 07/31/2009 at 12:02pm - love - by WiltedFlower (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was working on a client's roof. Some neighborhood kids thought it would be hilarious if they knocked over my ladder. I was stuck on this roof in serious heat. I caught the attention of a pedestrian to come to my rescue. It was a little old lady. She gave me the finger and left. FML

#4179768
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48302) - you deserved it (2163)

On 07/31/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by roofer (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking around Walmart feeling pretty good about myself as I received numerous looks from guys in passing. All of a sudden a man approached me to tell me that my dress was extremely see-through. And, since I was wearing a thong, he and everyone else could totally see my ass. FML

#4178652
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11515) - you deserved it (54616)

On 07/31/2009 at 9:43am - misc - by EmBAREassed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my family took me to a wig store saying I wouldn't feel so insecure about being bald because of my chemo treatments. When I told them I accepted myself and didn't want a wig, they came out and told me THEY couldn't accept it. My own family is embarrassed of me over something I can't control. FML

#4177051
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90801) - you deserved it (3333)

On 07/31/2009 at 5:35am - misc - by Betrayed (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad told me he was planning to have his steady girlfriend over for dinner. He's only had a few relationships since he and my mom split up when I was very young, so I was excited to meet the woman. He then told me that I knew her already. My dad is dating my aunt on my mothers side. FML

#4176016
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48635) - you deserved it (2369)

On 07/31/2009 at 4:03am - love - by FreakedOut (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was talking to my guy friend on the phone. He said, "You sound depressed, I should cheer you up and give you a big hug." Jokingly, I responded, "You wouldn't hug something as gross as me." His response? "You'd be surprised." FML

#4174665
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13324) - you deserved it (39806)

On 07/31/2009 at 2:44am - misc - by Girafarig (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work, I fell asleep. This is how I discovered that when I'm sleeping, and am scared awake by my boss with an air horn, I yelp louder than a terrier and piss my pants. FML

#4173931
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10160) - you deserved it (44132)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:25am - work - by pisspantsjob (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I covered for my friend at work because he said he was having car troubles and was going to be late. Two hours into the shift, I got a call from my roommate asking why my girlfriend had moved out. Turns out, I'd covered my friend's shift so he could help my girlfriend move out behind my back. FML

#4173235
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43935) - you deserved it (2802)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after receiving a message about being hired at a retail store, I went to the orientation for new employees. The trainer seemed perplexed when I told him my name, but he gave me my paperwork and continued with training. At the end of the 8 hour day, he asked to talk to me. I wasn't actually hired. FML

#4172505
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38299) - you deserved it (2517)

On 07/30/2009 at 9:30pm - work - by LMN (man) - United States (Washington)



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