Today, I got fired from a great baby sitting job because the little girl said I was boring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28943) - you deserved it (12160)
On 02/21/2009 at 11:49pm - kids - by anon (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I had a job interview at a restauraunt opening up. One manager hypothetically asked me why I should be hired. I said I was more efficient than most. I left to find I'd locked my keys in the car. It took all the managers to help me get my keys out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8190) - you deserved it (22676)
On 02/21/2009 at 11:22pm - misc - by FailAtLife - United States (Illinois)
Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67070) - you deserved it (5798)
On 02/21/2009 at 10:23pm - intimacy - by not getting any anymore (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while changing my tampon in the stall of my high school's bathroom, I lost control of the plastic applicator. The blood-covered apparatus shot out like a rocket underneath the stall door. For a moment I thought no one noticed, then the screaming began. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41935) - you deserved it (4262)
On 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm - misc - by isuckatlife (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to the doctor with my parents. When the doctor asked if I was sexually active, I said 'Yes.' My mom laughed and said 'Good one.' My dad, for added effect said, 'Your hand doesn't count.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (54166) - you deserved it (5261)
On 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm - intimacy - by Nails (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23429) - you deserved it (67218)
On 02/21/2009 at 9:07pm - intimacy - by svet (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my mother told me she was going out of town this weekend. I re-assured her that I would not throw a party. She replied "Oh, like you have enough friends to do that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35721) - you deserved it (2900)
On 02/21/2009 at 8:20pm - misc - by stinker (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I got my fake ID and went out with the boys to dinner and the bars. One of my friends asked to see my ID. He noticed my birthday didn't make me over 21. I paid $170 for a fake ID with my real birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9416) - you deserved it (55816)
On 02/21/2009 at 8:19pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while on a blind date at Hooters, I ordered my food and the waitress asked me if I was stoned, because she couldn't understand me. I have a speech impediment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47646) - you deserved it (3056)
On 02/21/2009 at 8:15pm - health - by Vince (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, while working on a carpentry project with my friend at 2am, and enjoying some beers, I cut my hand and realized I needed medical attention. Neither of us being in driving shape, I knocked on my parents bedroom door to request a ride. I was told I had to wait for them to "finish." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37688) - you deserved it (7246)
On 02/21/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by Whothrewhim (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said I was way too good at sex so I must have lied about not having much experience, and he "wouldn't be with someone who is hiding something." WTF? FML
I agree, your life sucks (73380) - you deserved it (5496)
On 02/21/2009 at 7:13pm - intimacy - by pchemist (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was approached by a girl who called me a slut for sleeping with her boyfriend, then punched me in the face. I'm a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59906) - you deserved it (2200)
On 02/21/2009 at 6:37pm - misc - by well then... (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was telling my mom that I was really nervous about going to the gynecologist for the first time. Her response, "Oh don't worry, it's not like it's the first time you've spread your legs!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31730) - you deserved it (7579)
On 02/21/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by taperjeangirl - United States (Washington)
Friday 24 May 2013
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