Today, I received a card in the mail. It was from my vet's office. Written inside was "We send our sympathy during this trying time." I haven't been home in three days. I can't find my dog and my mother won't talk about it. My dog was 7. She hated that dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56249) - you deserved it (1595)
On 03/05/2009 at 11:06am - animals - by nochance (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I had my quarterly review with my supervisor at the warehouse I work at. He told me I was doing great and we discussed my raise. After I left his office, his supervisor told me I was being fired for my attendance. The last time I missed work was to attend a funeral. Five months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48194) - you deserved it (1333)
On 03/05/2009 at 10:10am - work - by crub (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, it was my birthday. I set up a dinner party for 20 of my closest friends. I arrived at the restaurant, fully dressed and everything. When I got there, I thought everyone was ready to surprise me, but instead, nobody showed up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (83423) - you deserved it (5278)
On 03/05/2009 at 2:24am - misc - by STUPID BIRTHDAY (man) - United States
Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44266) - you deserved it (3281)
On 03/05/2009 at 2:14am - work - by Shell (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend of almost a year because he was no longer sexually attracted to me because I'm "overweight," even though I only weigh 130 pounds. Afterward I went to my friend's house and sat in an old wooden chair. It broke into pieces as soon as I sat down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74862) - you deserved it (7920)
On 03/05/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by saltinawound (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, an elderly gentleman walked into the UPS Store where I work asking to use the laminating machine. I explained to him that we keep it behind the counter and I would do it for him, whence he produced several graphic photos of him having it off with nasty looking women to be laminated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44699) - you deserved it (3486)
On 03/05/2009 at 12:14am - work - by UhhhUhhhRRRick (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, during my choral concert, I was helping turn the pages for the pianist who was accompanying the singers. In the middle of the song, one of the pages slipped and fell into his crotch area. In a panic, I frantically reached to grab the music. Well, I grabbed something. It wasn't the music. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31164) - you deserved it (9914)
On 03/04/2009 at 11:29pm - misc - by a person - United States (California)
Today, I was debating weed legalization in drug awareness. I was thoroughly unleashing arguments: how marijuana turns normal citizens into criminals, how the government spends billions to enforce drug laws, when I lost my train of thought. My teacher grinned saying, "My point exactly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10953) - you deserved it (37439)
On 03/04/2009 at 11:21pm - health - by katzperiod (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it she picked it up, put it down and said "no". Then she started to eat the dessert. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70661) - you deserved it (3718)
On 03/04/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)
Today, a creepy man on the subway said he liked my eyeballs. It was the best compliment I've received in months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51737) - you deserved it (2851)
On 03/04/2009 at 7:29pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was in the gym, when i noticed three trainers who worked there staring at me. Thinking that they were checking me out, i turned the speed on the tread mill higher. Finally one of the trainers came over, and asked me to leave until i got a sports bra that actually worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18917) - you deserved it (35315)
On 03/04/2009 at 6:45pm - health - by girlie (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went to the jewelry store to sell my wedding ring after a long and painful divorce. The shop owner took one look at it and called the cops because I tried to sell him a diamond ring that had been stolen from him 3 years ago. My ex-husband left the country a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60378) - you deserved it (2078)
On 03/04/2009 at 6:42pm - misc - by ringmaster101 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I realized that my roommate has been using my loofah to clean our toilet. I've been cleaning myself with the shit of four college boys for the last six months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63091) - you deserved it (3512)
On 03/04/2009 at 6:38pm - misc - by arrrrggggghhhh (man) - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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