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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from United States

Today, I went to the doctors and was told I would need an inhaler. My mom came back from the pharmacy and told me the copay of $35 dollars was way too expensive, so she is making me use my cat's old inhaler. My mom values my cat's ability to breathe more then my own. FML

#5627700
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35425) - you deserved it (2197)

On 10/03/2009 at 7:17pm - misc - by juliasaman - United States (Washington)

Today, I was on a date with a guy having a great time. I went up to go to the ladies' room, but as I walked back to the table, I heard some giggles. I looked and found out why. My skirt was tucked into my underwear. I was wearing my lucky Star Wars-themed panties. FML

#5622961
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32147) - you deserved it (13740)

On 10/03/2009 at 2:41pm - love - by diva467 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to dress in all black with a ski mask and use my spare key to break into my house as a joke. He though it was even funnier when I jumped out the window and broke my leg. FML

#5622271
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38705) - you deserved it (5765)

On 10/03/2009 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was helping my friend pack her carry on for her vacation. I drove her to the airport, and after her plane took off, I noticed I put my cell phone in her purse. Her vacation is 2 months long. FML

#5621142
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13993) - you deserved it (28972)

On 10/03/2009 at 12:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 9 year old little sister is coming back in town with the rest of my family. She specifically asked me to feed her fish. I totally forgot until she called me 10 minutes ago to tell me she was on her way home and couldn't wait to see her fishie. He's dead. FML

#5620917
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6819) - you deserved it (55737)

On 10/03/2009 at 12:28pm - misc - by deadfish - United States (Florida)

Today, during the opening night performance of our schools musical, while I wasn't on stage I decided to use the restroom. I came out to find two of my fellow actresses putting their hands over my mouth. Apparently, I had left my microphone on and everyone heard me using the restroom. FML

Today, I spent the entire day packing my car full of boxes for my move tomorrow. When I finally finished, I realized I didn't have the car key. It's inside one of the boxes. FML

#5618503
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13329) - you deserved it (28651)

On 10/03/2009 at 8:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I checked in a group of men from Mexico. I speak just enough Spanish to realize they're discussing my breasts. I have to stand there smiling while checking in three more people. FML

#5618007
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32517) - you deserved it (3532)

On 10/03/2009 at 6:31am - work - by Spanishredhead (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up excited for my trip to Jamaica with my friends. We went to the airport, and I gave them my passport to check in. They gave it back. It had expired three weeks ago. I watched my friends board the plane while I'm stuck in the city. FML

#5617258
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13739) - you deserved it (46212)

On 10/03/2009 at 3:59am - misc - by hahahaha91 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went to see my guidance counselor. I was supposed to hear from my college about a scholarship by October 3rd. I was worried since it was already the 2nd so I went to talk to her. She never turned in my nomination. Goodbye $80,000 scholarship. FML

#5615281
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47409) - you deserved it (2661)

On 10/03/2009 at 12:37am - misc - by Screwed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I checked my email for the hundredth time, hoping to hear back from a potential employer about a job I really want. No response. Why? My email with resume attached has been sitting in my Outbox for the past week. I never actually sent it out in the first place. FML

#5612700
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7710) - you deserved it (34192)

On 10/02/2009 at 10:23pm - work - by Unemployed (woman) - United States

Today, I got offered a ride to go home for the weekend. I go to college six hours away from home and haven't seen my family for almost two months. When I called my mom with the good news, she told me not to come. FML

#5611182
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32949) - you deserved it (2167)

On 10/02/2009 at 9:01pm - misc - by wowjuststop - United States (Virginia)



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