Today, I was picking up my daughter from my ex-husband's house and his new girlfriend was there. I called to my daughter that it was time to leave and she clung to his girlfriend and said 'Mommy, I don't want to leave.' She wasn't talking to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (111636) - you deserved it (7034)
On 03/07/2009 at 3:15pm - kids - by divorced (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and i told the waiter I'll have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, " Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51686) - you deserved it (6340)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:36pm - love - by Kate (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (47888) - you deserved it (14799)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:28pm - kids - by Dang-ItsDanielle (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (83413) - you deserved it (15543)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Cody (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my friend sent me an instant message, telling me how excited she was that she was accepted to a FIT Summer Program. I told her I was so proud, and that she can finally lose that excess weight. She told me that she meant Fashion Institute of Technology. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11204) - you deserved it (54712)
On 03/07/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)
Today, I laced up my fabulous new boots and walked outside to find my hot neighbor, with whom I carpool every morning. I struck a pose, feeling quite confident. Upon taking my first step down the stairs, I fell forward. I woke up an hour later with 7 stitches in my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16443) - you deserved it (29614)
On 03/07/2009 at 12:16pm - misc - by Triple F (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I was sitting on my 70 year old grandmothers bed with my older brother. I decided to snoop through the cabinet at the back of her bed, and I pulled out what I naively thought was a strange looking flashlight. When I twisted the bottom of it to see what would happen it started vibrating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19173) - you deserved it (54518)
On 03/07/2009 at 2:35am - intimacy - by You Wish (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my name was called during an assembly because I won some sort of prize. Everyone booed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59169) - you deserved it (4932)
On 03/07/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by ladeda (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I couldn't answer almost any of the questions in the game "Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?" I'm a 40 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11814) - you deserved it (43056)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:43am - misc - by laywer_man (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, at a hard rock concert, a bunch of guys accidentally knocked down a port-a-potty while moshing. I was inside that port-a-potty. FML
I agree, your life sucks (173558) - you deserved it (12039)
On 03/07/2009 at 12:51am - misc - by shit_upon_literally (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I finally told my best friend whom I've secretly been in love with for two years that I was in love with her but at the last second chickened out and said I was joking. She replied with "Don't scare me like that. I thought i was going to have to find a new best friend for a second" FML
I agree, your life sucks (56221) - you deserved it (5321)
On 03/06/2009 at 11:17pm - love - by crap (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to visit my Grandmother, accidentally leaving my phone home during the weekend. When I got back I had 2 texts from my crush. One saying "I want to take the most beautiful girl to prom, go with me?" and the other saying, "Fine fattie, I'll ask someone else." FML
I agree, your life sucks (61332) - you deserved it (5442)
On 03/06/2009 at 9:55pm - love - by promdump (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I got a letter from my college saying that if my tuition was not paid in the next 24 hours, I will be terminated from classes. Turns out account services has been depositing my tuition money in another student’s account whose social security number was one digit different from mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65442) - you deserved it (1940)
On 03/06/2009 at 8:48pm - money - by collegedoesntwantme (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Monday 20 May 2013
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