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FMLs submitted from United States

Today, my husband came clean to having an affair with my sister. I later found out my other sister encouraged the affair because she thought they'd be a cute couple. FML

#21194001
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52741) - you deserved it (3786)

On 06/30/2014 at 5:06pm - love - by outoflove (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up loudly screaming from a "night" terror. I say "night"; I was actually at my desk at work, in the middle of the day, surrounded by dozens of co-workers in their cubicles. FML

#21193942
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34256) - you deserved it (9580)

On 06/30/2014 at 3:51pm - work - by Whoopsie (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found the culprit, and to avoid a conflict, I just swiped it back when he wasn't looking. I felt pretty good about everything, until I got back home and realized it wasn't actually my towel after all. FML

#21193691
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25469) - you deserved it (37609)

On 06/30/2014 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sped off down the road, then realized to my horror that my cat was clinging to the roof of the car. FML

Today, I donated to a charity website. My card was repeatedly refused by the website but when I went on my account, I was charged for each time I tried. I was scammed by a charity. FML

#21193277
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49479) - you deserved it (7800)

On 06/30/2014 at 1:02am - money - by Charitable (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after working the night shift, I accidentally left my iPod at the office. I woke up later and went on Facebook. To my dismay, I saw some coworker had posted stuff on my wall, such as, "I really have to take a shit!" and "Yes, my tits are real!" FML

#21192976
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39122) - you deserved it (10565)

On 06/29/2014 at 9:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that the lump under my carpet that I stomped on to flatten was actually a dead frog that had gotten caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. FML

#21192954
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39912) - you deserved it (6452)

On 06/29/2014 at 9:05pm - misc - by Unknown - United States

Today, after leaving my mom's house, I got 4 text messages from her about how I was a terrible person for not saying goodbye to my sister when I left. The "sister" she was referring to is the family dog. FML

#21192815
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39186) - you deserved it (4169)

On 06/29/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom told me to take out the trash. I thought it would be a good idea to Hulk-smash it into the can. I missed. The bag ripped and garbage flew everywhere. FML

#21192717
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21192) - you deserved it (54532)

On 06/29/2014 at 4:37pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

#21192543
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59342) - you deserved it (4609)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, less than a week after ranting to my husband about how sick some people are to sexualize characters from kids' TV shows, I looked through his browser history and found out he's very much into Powerpuff Girls porn. FML

#21192500
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40088) - you deserved it (8116)

On 06/29/2014 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to my friend's house to give him some moral support as he came out of the closet to his family. I left with a black eye. FML

#21192141
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41304) - you deserved it (5746)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:04am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML

#21192088
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47637) - you deserved it (3492)

On 06/29/2014 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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