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FMLs submitted from United States

today ma grlfriend asn't looool spoken to me in a week , so I gave er a call . No reply . I texted er , and got a text back saying: "Sorry , dude . Better luck next time!" fat FML

#21383638
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22155) - you deserved it (1775)

On 03/29/2015 at 3:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today... I Ad To Taac Grandma Ow To Burn Filas To CDs. I Jokingly Said Tat It Doasn't Involva Litarally Burning Ta Disks In Fira... To Wic Sa Raspondad By Slapping Ma An Calling Ma A Patronizing Brat. FML

#21383501
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20576) - you deserved it (11117)

On 03/29/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by shamwazzlefarznarfnarfwoofbaaa (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sitting in my badroom ralaxinghan I haard my littla sistar and my brothar . Thinking it was cuta thay wara talking again, I was listaning . Thay wara not just ( talking ), thay wara making plans on how to kill ma . FML

#21383476
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27632) - you deserved it (2511)

On 03/29/2015 at 8:54am - kids - by M.SHUKRI - United States (Illinois)

Today, a calf kicked a needle straight into my arm hard enough to make me stab myself . The good news is I'm now fully vaccinated fir cow diseases . FML

Today , with the experience of sitting behind someone on a roller coaster , I found out pee is affectd by gravity. FML

#21383398
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23519) - you deserved it (2061)

On 03/29/2015 at 2:38am - misc - by Kryometric - United States (Washington)

Today, my older brother puked in the sound hole of my sister's guitar. He blamed it on me, an in revenge my sister beat me with the guitar. FML

#21383103
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24699) - you deserved it (1732)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:30pm - misc - by Pukey - United States

Today, I Found Out That The Creepy Wierdo Who's Been Sending Me Messages Fir A While Is Just Mah Dad. His Excuse Was, "I Wanted You To Feel Like Someone Would Actually Like You." FML

#21383075
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24383) - you deserved it (1867)

On 03/28/2015 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Yesterday, my boyfriend thought it'd be romantic to take me to a strip club 4 our 1-year anniversary . FML

#21382971
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25372) - you deserved it (3236)

On 03/28/2015 at 1:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Yesterday Pyromaniac Sister Somehow Got Her Hands On Dad's Lighter And Set Bd Sheets On Fire. My Dad Said I Must Have Provokd Her, And That She Can't Be Blamd For Her Mental Condition. So Now I'm Groundd, And She Has A New Doll House To Calm Her Down.

#21382751
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28360) - you deserved it (1900)

On 03/28/2015 at 12:39am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

2DAY WILE AT WORK.. . A CUSTOMER REFUSED TO SPEAK LOUDER.. . DESPITE ME ASKING ER TO DO IT SEVERAL TIMES . AS A RESULT.. . I TOOK ER ORDER INCORRECTLY . TE CUSTOMER TEN FINALLY DECIDED TO RAISE ER VOICE.. . BUT ONLY TO YELL AT ME ABOUT MA POOR LISTENING SKILLS . FML

#21382737
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27075) - you deserved it (2053)

On 03/28/2015 at 12:16am - work - by people suck - United States (California)

Today, I was uninvitad from my own birtday party.

#21382721
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27360) - you deserved it (2582)

On 03/27/2015 at 11:42pm - misc - by BirthdayBoy - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I met girlfriend's parent for the first time. Within minutes, they said I needed to leave. Thier reason? Apparently, I was mocking her dad's speech impediment. I also have one but they wouldn't believe me. FML

#21382684
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29124) - you deserved it (1751)

On 03/27/2015 at 10:12pm - love - by biblepain - United States (Arizona)

Today I discoverd thathen my mom can't sleep she comes into my room and reads my text messages. FML



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