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FMLs submitted from United Kingdom

Today, I found out I was pregnant. I told my boyfriend, who held me and promised it'd be all right, and he'd never leave me. One sandwich later, he'd forgotten about the whole thing, and dumped me when I reminded him. FML

#13339681
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36036) - you deserved it (5319)

On 10/06/2010 at 3:21am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, the girl my ex-boyfriend cheated on me with had a job interview at my place of work. If she gets the job, she'll be my manager. FML

#13287891
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35734) - you deserved it (2540)

On 10/02/2010 at 10:26am - work - by help me! - United Kingdom (London)

Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML

#13274886
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24071) - you deserved it (29199)

On 10/01/2010 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I passed out at a party after having a few too many, as one does. I woke up with swastikas and penises drawn on my face with permanent marker. I now have to go home, using public transport, to my prudish, Jewish dad who thought I was at my friend's house for a sleepover with no alcohol. FML

Today, I bought a new Ipod to replace my old one which decided to stop working. After purchasing my new nano Ipod, I decided to bang my old Ipod on the desk very hard because it was useless. It started working again. FML

#13221595
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23730) - you deserved it (8628)

On 09/27/2010 at 11:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, the guy I like recommended I buy this computer game. Wanting to impress him, I agreed. Turns out it was a joke. I am now the proud owner of Microsoft Train Simulator 2005, and he can't stop laughing. FML

#13205814
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8459) - you deserved it (31846)

On 09/26/2010 at 4:14am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got into my car and realised that my CDs were no longer in my glove box. According to the police, the random key code for my car type has been cracked, and thieves can now let themselves in whenever they want. The manufacturer says they can't do anything about it. FML

#13158872
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28266) - you deserved it (2745)

On 09/22/2010 at 5:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I put an anonymous note under my neighbour's door asking them to not have sex so loudly during the day. Since then, I haven't heard any sex. Unfortunately, I have heard a woman crying loudly because she just found out about her husband's affair. FML

#13157318
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44368) - you deserved it (9764)

On 09/22/2010 at 3:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I found out I have a job interview coming up. For the job I'm currently doing and have been for the last nine months. My manager told me not to expect too much. FML

#13152875
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19608) - you deserved it (2023)

On 09/22/2010 at 2:56am - work - by innuendom - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that my mother has been seeing my maths teacher. I'm still failing his class. FML

#13144525
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25767) - you deserved it (6804)

On 09/21/2010 at 5:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I realised that I could see my own mustache out of my peripheral vision while I was eating. I'm a 23 year old woman. FML

#13141247
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22417) - you deserved it (13089)

On 09/21/2010 at 10:23am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML

#13140704
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34511) - you deserved it (4500)

On 09/21/2010 at 8:44am - kids - by cganon - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my dad touching his knob, in the kitchen, while cooking. FML

#13127028
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (3523)

On 09/20/2010 at 10:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)



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