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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend told me she was bored. During sex. FML

#15001390
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31953) - you deserved it (20590)

On 02/16/2011 at 10:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML

#14963197
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25297) - you deserved it (3076)

On 02/13/2011 at 8:18pm - misc - by alice (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I spent three and a half hours creating a Wikipedia page for myself. Three minutes after publishing, it was deleted due to me being a "Non-notable person nobody's ever heard of." FML

#14939182
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8374) - you deserved it (49308)

On 02/11/2011 at 7:26pm - misc - by shredded - United Kingdom (Richmond upon Thames)

Today, I came downstairs disappointed thinking that my parents had forgotten my birthday. Turns out they didn't forget, they just couldn't be bothered to do anything for it. FML

#14928648
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27705) - you deserved it (2709)

On 02/10/2011 at 10:24pm - misc - by Shivvy (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I got an email from my seminar tutor asking why I wasn't in class. I was sitting next to him. FML

#14924630
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25451) - you deserved it (2473)

On 02/10/2011 at 5:48pm - misc - by JaneVI (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was on the phone to a guy I really like from work. We'd been talking for about 2 minutes, when he said he was getting another call, and put me on hold. I was so excited to be on the phone with him, it took me a whole 15 minutes to realise he had actually just hung up on me. FML

#14883708
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28826) - you deserved it (6709)

On 02/07/2011 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex with my "corpse." FML

#14881975
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51490) - you deserved it (7118)

On 02/07/2011 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by Anon. (woman) - United Kingdom (Bradford)

Today, I found out that my sister is going to spend the last two months of her pregancy in my house to be with my mother. She's bringing with her her three wild children. The visit also happens to coincide with my end of year examinations in May and June. FML

#14851540
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30378) - you deserved it (2870)

On 02/05/2011 at 11:33am - kids - by stressedandcrowded (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk. As he got home he asked me to marry him, I was going to say yes until he said, "Oh wait, wrong woman." FML

#14849196
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42142) - you deserved it (5206)

On 02/05/2011 at 4:32am - love - by em - United Kingdom (North East Lincolnshire)

Today, I fell over a wet floor sign warning you not to fall over. The irony hurt more than the fall. FML

#14849029
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21017) - you deserved it (8783)

On 02/05/2011 at 4:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, my boyfriend got a new rifle. He forced me to watch him stripping it, oiling it, and sliding things into its barrel. We then watched 'Enemy at the Gates'. I basically endured 4 hours of gun porn. FML

#14836344
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30263) - you deserved it (7360)

On 02/04/2011 at 2:59am - intimacy - by missbrit (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, I was pissed that I got a £60 parking ticket so rang my friend to rant about it. I then got pulled over by the cops for using my phone, and was fined £120. FML

#14807320
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8784) - you deserved it (62511)

On 02/02/2011 at 2:12am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I wrote a 2000 word essay on "Las Vegas - The City That Never Sleeps". I was proud of my work, until someone pointed out that New York is "The City That Never Sleeps", not Vegas. FML

#14793954
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9420) - you deserved it (37860)

On 02/01/2011 at 5:35am - work - by mmaisie (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)



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