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FMLs submitted from United Kingdom

Today, I was cycling home when I saw my sister, who lives a 4 hour drive away, walking past me on the path. I turned my head and called to her, causing me not to notice the pothole in front of me. My front wheel went in and I went over the handlebars. It wasn't even my sister. FML

#20933277
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36039) - you deserved it (10301)

On 10/25/2013 at 8:19am - misc - by karlajjjjj (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I had my first interview in over a year. I panicked and passed out. FML

#20932303
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38441) - you deserved it (5787)

On 10/24/2013 at 11:52am - work - by s13495 (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of)

Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML

#20929016
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52822) - you deserved it (3904)

On 10/21/2013 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I noticed that my sweat smelled like cat food. FML

#20928538
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33041) - you deserved it (6559)

On 10/21/2013 at 2:53am - health - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

#20921711
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46212) - you deserved it (4375)

On 10/15/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I found out that my brother is adamant that if he records silence, then listens to said silence at full volume, it'll improve the headphones' noise-blocking abilities. I live with a complete idiot. FML

#20921378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37551) - you deserved it (2910)

On 10/15/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by Eggs6131 (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I got dragged to dinner with my grandparents. It was awful from the start, but things took a turn for the worse when my grandpa went to give me a kiss on the cheek as we left. I could clearly see lice crawling around in his beard, and I couldn't stop it from touching my face. FML

#20917563
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42747) - you deserved it (3459)

On 10/12/2013 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (South Lanarkshire)

Today, feeling bored and lonely, I drove into town to wander around the shops and go to Subway for lunch. While there, I picked up two trays and put one on the opposite side of the table, along with some of my rubbish, to make it look like I was with someone. FML

#20916326
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33216) - you deserved it (9568)

On 10/11/2013 at 11:18am - misc - by FriutlessApple (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my new colleagues took me up on my idea of a group night out. Perhaps they'll actually invite me along next time. FML

#20911387
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36571) - you deserved it (2734)

On 10/07/2013 at 6:51pm - work - by Loner_Lou (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML

#20908563
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42477) - you deserved it (7758)

On 10/05/2013 at 4:23pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46394) - you deserved it (3798)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML

#20907593
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41339) - you deserved it (2988)

On 10/04/2013 at 8:04pm - misc - by ricky the sage (man) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, a friend complimented me on my "smoky eyeshadow". I wasn't wearing eye makeup. She was complimenting the result of my insomnia. FML

#20904600
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38733) - you deserved it (2894)

On 10/02/2013 at 12:22pm - health - by Tired (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)



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