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FMLs submitted from Sweden

Today, my boyfriend again accused me of cheating on him. This time, it was because I delayed replying to his text message so I could feed my pet. Apparently I'm fucking my pet toad now. Jesus. FML

#20029882
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24942) - you deserved it (4817)

On 08/19/2012 at 12:52pm - love - by youre dumped shitforbrain (woman) - Sweden (Sodermanlands Lan)

Today, I was at a barbecue with my extended family. I was chatting to my grandma, when my idiotic brother decided to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing sounded so much like a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamed and practically shat my pants. FML

#19993096
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8952) - you deserved it (26487)

On 07/30/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by NaKreen (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I was listening to some Michael Jackson through my earphones when I saw this really cute girl. Trying to impress, I aproached her while doing some dance moves, not thinking about how unbelievably stupid it must have looked without the music. FML

#19913631
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7349) - you deserved it (31534)

On 07/09/2012 at 6:37am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML

#19824729
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26629) - you deserved it (3077)

On 06/21/2012 at 4:28pm - misc - by tubby (woman) - Sweden (Blekinge Lan)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37172) - you deserved it (3998)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, during the early hours, I got hungry and went to grab something to eat. I entered the kitchen, only to see my stark-naked dad sitting at the table, eating cereal and reading the paper. He just nodded at me and said, "Son." I think I need a new pair of eyes. FML

#19751282
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21311) - you deserved it (2108)

On 06/07/2012 at 7:09pm - misc - by Rohirus (man) - Sweden

Today, it was the first time I was going to fly first class. I ended up in the bathroom almost the whole flight with diarrhea. FML

#19650597
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22170) - you deserved it (1899)

On 05/20/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML

#19633207
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8308) - you deserved it (34232)

On 05/16/2012 at 5:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my boyfriend of two years logged into my Facebook account and broke up with himself. He is now receiving loads of sympathy, while I'm being accused of lying about it to save my reputation. FML

#19617909
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26829) - you deserved it (2612)

On 05/13/2012 at 5:26pm - love - by soso (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

#19607657
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24144) - you deserved it (3640)

On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I was on an airplane, waiting to go to the bathroom. After a few minutes, the man behind me asked what I was waiting for, and checked the bathroom. It was empty, and there was a big line behind me. FML

#19601816
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7820) - you deserved it (24054)

On 05/10/2012 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was so lonely that I had a conversation with myself on my way home. It was only when I reached my apartment complex that I discovered that my neighbour had been walking behind me, laughing to himself the whole way. FML

#19525636
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18116) - you deserved it (9257)

On 04/25/2012 at 12:50am - misc - by unfortunate (woman) - Sweden

Today, my friend was waiting outside the store while I bought a newspaper. Through the window, I saw two guys getting physical with him, so I went outside and they took off. I muttered, "Yeah, I thought so." They then turned around and beat the crap out of us. FML

#19502364
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16987) - you deserved it (21607)

On 04/20/2012 at 6:55pm - health - by burr415 (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



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