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FMLs submitted from South Africa

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

#14368305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26480) - you deserved it (9765)

On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I got a ride in a friend's car. As I sat down, her younger brother started laughing hysterically from the backseat. In between giggles, he admitted he peed there a few minutes ago. FML

#14223629
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26345) - you deserved it (2378)

On 12/16/2010 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I went to see a psychiatrist for my depression and low self esteem. While in the waiting room, I overheard a guy telling his friend how ugly I am. FML

#14023842
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34744) - you deserved it (3437)

On 11/29/2010 at 1:58pm - health - by sadness - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, the hooker I have been seeing regularly for almost a year texted me to say she thinks we should no longer see each other again. I just got dumped by a hooker. FML

#13915907
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15709) - you deserved it (53053)

On 11/20/2010 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by pst - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML

#13841741
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55419) - you deserved it (2702)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, my friend and I offered a hot girl a lift home from campus. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she climbed in behind me. As I adjusted my seat forward to give her more leg room, my friend pulled off - slamming my seat back into her legs. FML

#13300541
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22758) - you deserved it (3748)

On 10/03/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by tukkies (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I took pictures of myself and my girlfriend doing naughty things together on my camera. My mom later asked me if she could borrow the camera for the weekend. Without thinking, I gave her the camera. FML

#12836221
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10959) - you deserved it (48142)

On 08/31/2010 at 9:13am - intimacy - by weezel (man) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I discovered that I have developed a latex allergy. I'm a third year medical student. FML

#12820970
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31148) - you deserved it (2619)

On 08/30/2010 at 12:18pm - misc - by Sally19863 - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I was woken up because the police were pounding on my door, and saying I am under arrest for stealing road signs. My friends went drinking last night and thought it would be funny to steal seven stop signs, four bus stop signs, and two children crossing signs then plant them on my front lawn. FML

#12120834
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37535) - you deserved it (4409)

On 07/26/2010 at 8:26am - misc - by Busted (man) - South Africa

Today, while driving on a totally deserted, long, straight road in the middle of the bush, I sneezed and drove right into a pole on the side of the road. It was the only pole for over 50 km. FML

#11610497
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34065) - you deserved it (6993)

On 07/02/2010 at 11:05am - misc - by Mikimiks93 (woman) - South Africa (Limpopo)

Today, a customer came into the music shop I work in to look at guitars. After calling the customer "Dude," and "Man," numerous times, they stalked off suddenly. When I asked if everything was okay, they responded with, "I'm female, you asshole!" FML

#10044709
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10979) - you deserved it (38066)

On 04/21/2010 at 4:29pm - work - by Z88 - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, after confronting my husband about lack of intimacy in our marriage, I found him playing with himself. His response to my shock was ‘This is less work and less involving.’ FML

#9100047
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19736) - you deserved it (4259)

On 03/15/2010 at 10:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I had a sip of my coffee and felt a lump of some kind enter my mouth. I thought it was a bit of biscuit, and then remembered I didn't have biscuits this morning with my coffee. I took it out of my mouth and it was a huge black fly. I then spat the rest of my coffee all over my laptop. FML

#8889347
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24625) - you deserved it (3927)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:08am - misc - by jess (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)



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