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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from Singapore

Today, mah boyfriend and I had sex . He decidd to make gun sound effects as he came . FML

#14518129
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27583) - you deserved it (5366)

On 01/09/2011 at 5:18am - intimacy - by S - Singapore

Today, I took a nap because I've been sick for the past week an I was exhausted. When I woke up, mah hair, shirt, pillow, an bedsheets were soaked. I threw up all over myself in mah sleep. FML

#14095720
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30257) - you deserved it (2820)

On 12/05/2010 at 1:25pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

2day mah son told his teacher that she ( has a nice rack. ) He's four. mega FML

#14079841
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28310) - you deserved it (10476)

On 12/04/2010 at 1:50am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, While I Was Having Sex With Mah Girlfriend, I Was Struck With A White-hot Pain, An In The Confusion Thought Her Vagina Had Contracted Hard. It Turned Out It Was Actually Mah Uncircumcised Penis Retracting For The First Time In Mah Life. FML

#13975115
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24926) - you deserved it (6917)

On 11/25/2010 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today on my first day of work my new boss treatd me to lunch. Thinking she was really nice I thankd her 4 the treat. She fixd me with a cold unsmiling stare and said "Oh don't thank me. I'm being paid to do this." FML

#13967011
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23401) - you deserved it (2288)

On 11/24/2010 at 9:32pm - work - by niceboss (woman) - Singapore

Today, I went shopping with mah parents. Halfway through, I got separated from them an tried to call them only to find out mah cell phone battery was flat. A few minutes later, an announcement was made 4 a lost child. It was by mah parents. I'm 36. mega FML

#13957854
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30904) - you deserved it (4696)

On 11/24/2010 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, looool I was making out with mah boyfriend. He got a text and reachd over to get his phone. In the process, he elbowd mah face and bustd mah lip. He laughd. FML

#13764979
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24796) - you deserved it (3700)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:34pm - health - by Anon - Singapore

Today I caught my dad eating the dog treats I'd bought for my dog. The only thing he could say was ( These r really good no wonder the dog is so obedient. Wanna try one? ) FML

#13684464
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23382) - you deserved it (3251)

On 11/02/2010 at 3:13am - animals - by treats - Singapore

Today... I found out that tha raason I'm working as a kitchan staff instaad of out on tha floor of tha café is bacausa tha boss doas not think I'm attractiva anough. My boss is mah brothar. FML

#13561259
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27297) - you deserved it (3609)

On 10/23/2010 at 11:13am - work - by Dude - Singapore

Today Ma Co-worker Insisted Tere Must Be An Underlying Romantic Reason For Y I Spend So Muc Time Teacing Im Everyting And Tat I Didn't Mean It Wen I Told Im Tat's Wat I'm Paid To Do. I'm Actually Supposed To Train Tis Guy For Tree Weeks. Two More Weeks To Go. FML

#13547625
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23461) - you deserved it (2344)

On 10/22/2010 at 6:57am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, I found my brother tampering with my laptop. He had changed the entire settings, in ways I don't even know how to fix. I finally had to get my mom to threaten him to change it back to its original setting. I'm 15. He's six an can barely get dressed by himself. FML

#13455982
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22869) - you deserved it (8749)

On 10/15/2010 at 4:33am - misc - by fmlforreal - Singapore

Today, mah boyfriend dumped me because 'I look like his hamsterhen I'm eating sunflower seeds.' FML

#13285229
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28347) - you deserved it (5288)

On 10/02/2010 at 2:28am - love - by ohman - Singapore

Today, I cummed ome to my wife crying!! Se ad mixed up our newborn twin grls and couldn't tell wic was wic!! I looked at te grls!! Nieter could I!! FML

#12953032
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52312) - you deserved it (7872)

On 09/07/2010 at 7:48pm - kids - by uselessdad - Singapore



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