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FMLs submitted from Singapore

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32640) - you deserved it (111389)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I took an incredibly painful dump. After I cleaned myself up, I got up and was about to flush, until I saw something moving around in one of the logs of poop. It looked like an earthworm. It wasn't there when I sat down. FML

#20576240
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43114) - you deserved it (4315)

On 04/05/2013 at 2:51pm - health - by what if I'm being eaten from the inside out? oh my god (man) - Singapore

Today, my 2-year-old daughter and my 27-year-old husband both woke me up in the early hours of the morning. Their complaints were the same: they'd both wet the bed. FML

#20555313
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33903) - you deserved it (2612)

On 03/22/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by sickness and health my sphincter (woman) - Singapore

Today, I realized my acne is so bad that the Facebook face recognition could recognize all of my friends in a group photo except me. FML

#20516014
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26945) - you deserved it (3460)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by SadFace (man) - Singapore

Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML

#20148752
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23410) - you deserved it (2411)

On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore

Today, I decided to clean my face of unwanted visitors, and spent my shower popping the pimples on my cheeks. Twenty minutes later, I remembered that I was showering ahead of a date with my girlfriend. My cheeks now look like the crater-filled surface of Mars. FML

#20066193
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16102) - you deserved it (10409)

On 09/10/2012 at 12:19pm - health - by greeple - Singapore

Today, at my job at the mall, our music malfunctioned and now will only play the same three songs over and over again. Our manager won't let us turn it off because "the customers won't notice". FML

#20031862
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19136) - you deserved it (1336)

On 08/20/2012 at 12:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, after a spate of bad ones, I was in another job interview trying my hardest to give a good impression. After answering a few questions, I realized to my horror that while I was talking I was swiveling my chair from left to right like a nervous child. FML

#19748854
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17998) - you deserved it (3998)

On 06/07/2012 at 8:17am - work - by Swivel - Singapore

Today, I went on a second date with a guy I really liked, and we started chatting over dinner. That's when he told me about his paranoia, and how he's unsure if I'm out to get him or not. FML

#19747527
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19515) - you deserved it (1922)

On 06/07/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, a girl started talking to me at the bus stop. After it descended into an awkward silence, I jumped on my bus to avoid further conversation. She got on the same bus. And got off at the same stop. I swear the whole bus could feel the tension. FML

#19714803
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20588) - you deserved it (4083)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:24am - love - by Silent (man) - Singapore

Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML

#19611512
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18992) - you deserved it (1746)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore

Today, since I was grounded, I tried to sneak out of my room to attend a party by climbing out the second-storey window and down the tree. I was unharmed, but I probably should have checked to see if my dad was in the garden before climbing down. FML

#19312594
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6438) - you deserved it (42822)

On 03/20/2012 at 5:47am - misc - by treehugger - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend revealed to me that she has primeisodophobia. What is primeisodophobia, you may ask? Well, it's the fear of losing your virginity. FML

#19207829
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32126) - you deserved it (4902)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:23am - intimacy - by virginkiller (man) - Singapore



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