Today, while on the bus, an elderly man fell asleep on my shoulder. He looked sweet, so I didn't push him off. A few minutes later, the bus jolted and his head slipped down into my breasts. I'm pretty sure you don't smile like that when you're really asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32729) - you deserved it (4922)
On 04/04/2013 at 2:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)
Today, I climbed the tree in my backyard so I could cut off some stray branches. I ended up getting stuck, and instead of immediately getting help, my wife started laughing and recording me. The video is now circulating on Facebook, and my new nickname is "Hawkeye." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11609) - you deserved it (2082)
On 08/19/2012 at 2:09pm - misc - by spasticock (man) - Portugal (Setubal)
Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8206) - you deserved it (19621)
On 05/18/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by iris (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)
Today, my hatred for IKEA reignited when I rammed my knee into my hotel bathroom's plexiglass counter top while I was drying myself off. Their interior designer must have have been suffering brain damage when she matched everything with the floor tiles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9848) - you deserved it (3909)
On 03/02/2012 at 4:06pm - health - by Skyra (woman) - Portugal (Setubal)
This FML has been commented on by its original poster.
Today, I applied to a new gym. Now I have a hernia. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13700) - you deserved it (2915)
On 01/09/2012 at 9:56am - health - by naagodinho (man) - Portugal
Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23303) - you deserved it (9508)
On 11/02/2011 at 9:50am - love - by S. Bauer (woman) - Portugal
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