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FMLs submitted from Philippines

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me through Skype, with the message "my penis wants more, but my heart and mind don't want to hurt you." FML

#10462251
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34860) - you deserved it (3851)

On 05/11/2010 at 4:56am - intimacy - by justsingle (woman) - Philippines

Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML

#10414091
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39196) - you deserved it (3237)

On 05/08/2010 at 6:07am - intimacy - by notmydad. (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I went to the bathroom to take a piss. While washing my hands, I heard someone taking a large dump in one of the stalls. When he was finished, he left the bathroom without washing his hands. Turns out he was the IT guy I called to fix my computer. He sat down on my chair and used my keyboard. FML

#8979705
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25560) - you deserved it (2067)

On 03/10/2010 at 7:40pm - work - by penpendesrapen - Philippines (Manila)

Today, we had a NAT for our preparation for college. I did quite well and knew most of the answers. When I turned mine in, I realised I forgot to write my name. The proctor doesn't allow giving back test papers after it is turned in. And no, I can't retake it. FML

#7929962
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11189) - you deserved it (26529)

On 02/06/2010 at 7:35am - misc - by stupidupid (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, my roommate gave me a self-help book on alcoholism for my birthday. He's an alcoholic. I gave him that book around 8 months ago. FML

#6674667
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23165) - you deserved it (4722)

On 12/09/2009 at 12:29am - misc - by notalcoholic (man) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, my mom said I was the worst of her 5 children. My IQ is 130, an honor student, I don't smoke, I don't drink alcohol, or do drugs. I'm the "worst" because I don't go to church every Sunday. FML

#5791977
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46067) - you deserved it (10028)

On 10/12/2009 at 4:23am - misc - by worst (man) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, I joined a small disaster relief group. I remarked to the big, long-haired person beside me that it was surprising that I was the only female in the group. I got a cold stare. Later I asked another volunteer about that person. He answered, "Oh, her? She's my sister." FML

#5566724
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10133) - you deserved it (35092)

On 09/30/2009 at 3:30pm - work - by Blurry (woman) - Philippines (Batangas)

Today, I was going at a big concert in my university. I paid around a hundred-twenty bucks for my ticket. Outside the venue, people were handing out the tickets. For free. FML

#5457566
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29269) - you deserved it (12063)

On 09/24/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by akosirm (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, as I was coming out of the ladies' room, I saw a guy glancing at me. A few minutes later, I saw him coming at me at a fast rate. I decided to run from him. As I got out of the building and into a cab, I saw him from the window waving my phone at me. He was just trying to return it. FML

#5410009
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8818) - you deserved it (43241)

On 09/22/2009 at 3:36am - misc - by georgiana072 (woman) - Philippines (Benguet)

Today, I went to the mall and couldn't find a parking spot. After circling around for 20 minutes, I finally saw a shaded spot in the uncovered parking lot area under a tree. It turns out, I parked under a coconut tree. I could tell from the coconut planted into my hood. FML

#5225879
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30034) - you deserved it (9148)

On 09/13/2009 at 10:00am - misc - by superjstorm (man) - Philippines (Nueva Ecija)

Today, I was sitting in my garden and having a cup of tea while watching some dragonflies. I thought the dragonflies were really pretty, so I ran towards them and tried to catch their tails like I used to when I was a kid. They were exotic wasps. Ouch. FML

#5166138
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12621) - you deserved it (44610)

On 09/10/2009 at 9:40am - animals - by Lala (woman) - Philippines (Batangas)

Today, my friends and I went out drinking, and luckily enough, the guy I have had a crush on for four years now was there. I tried to get drunk so that I can make a move and blame it on the alcohol. I went in to whisper my confession in his ear... only to puke on him. FML

#4808009
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10058) - you deserved it (63353)

On 08/25/2009 at 10:17am - love - by sickened (woman) - Philippines (Rizal)

Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML

#4499935
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7670) - you deserved it (58708)

On 08/13/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by soapgirl (woman) - Philippines (Pampanga)



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