Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43786) - you deserved it (7783)
On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39216) - you deserved it (9437)
On 05/04/2013 at 4:11am - health - by thatonesilentkidinclass (man) - Philippines (Batangas)
Today, I got cut from my track team. My coach told me it was because my sprints were "too fast" for his liking. Huh? FML
I agree, your life sucks (46971) - you deserved it (2898)
On 04/18/2013 at 4:34pm - misc - by bhnja_ (man) - Philippines (Mandaue)
Today, my friend and I were trying out a site on which you talk to strangers using a mic and webcam. We came across a cute guy, who said to my friend, "Tell the fat guy to move." He was referring to me. I'm a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16158) - you deserved it (3593)
On 01/05/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by Pennepestoem (woman) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18235) - you deserved it (1866)
On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)
Today, after a week of looking for my car keys and being forced to drag my family around on public transportation, my wife found the keys in our car's ignition. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4548) - you deserved it (17992)
On 11/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, I realized that my five-year-old daughters are deranged psychopaths, when one of them started screaming to get my attention while the other pulled the car door shut on my fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14754) - you deserved it (1849)
On 10/26/2012 at 12:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, I had a big argument with my girlfriend, after she tried to stop me going home, even though it was already past my curfew. I got home, only to find out I'm grounded for staying out late, and dumped for being "inconsiderate". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16393) - you deserved it (2155)
On 10/06/2012 at 2:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Rizal)
Today, I had to hunt down and collect a stray dog's feces for my parasitology class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12126) - you deserved it (1996)
On 08/25/2012 at 3:11pm - animals - by missTyfied (woman) - Philippines (Rizal)
Today, I was playing an online game in nothing but my boxers, when suddenly a girl joined my team. I immediately felt embarrassed and put some pants on. There were no webcams involved. I need to get out more. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12973) - you deserved it (8921)
On 06/01/2012 at 12:48am - misc - by furred (man) - Philippines
Today, I learned that shaving while feeling upset is a very bad idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11701) - you deserved it (3935)
On 05/22/2012 at 6:35am - health - by Anonymous - Philippines
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32959) - you deserved it (19749)
On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)
Today, after finally returning to my house after over a year overseas, I found that my neighbours built a wall covering the only window in my bedroom. Not only is my room eternally musty and pitch black, but the council won't accept my complaint, because apparently my window was illegally built. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17166) - you deserved it (235)
On 02/14/2012 at 9:42am - misc - by BLAH (woman) - Philippines
Monday 20 May 2013
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