FMLs submitted from Norway

Today, I was browsing a website where you can talk to strangers anonymously, when I met a guy I really hit it off with. After talking for two hours, we decided to keep in touch, just in time for me to hit the "Next Person" button by mistake. There's no way to undo it. FML

by Ellen / 02/26/2010 at 2:58pm / Norway (Aust-Agder) / Love

Today, I bought Plan B for the first time. Not because I had unprotected sex, but to make the cashier think someone would actually sleep with me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/26/2010 at 6:11am / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy

Today, I found garbage in my postbox. In amongst the garbage, I found a note saying ''This is all you ever will get. Stay away from me!'', from the girl I sent a love poem to the other day. FML

by mylifeisahell / 02/18/2010 at 10:01am / Norway (Vestfold) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my turn to take out the trash. While walking to the dumpster, I slip and fall. It doesn't really hurt, so I get up and go to the dumpster, but the top is frozen stuck. It won't budge. Then I really pull with a lot of force, and the lid swings open and busts my nose. FML

by lolographic24 / 02/13/2010 at 8:44am / Norway (Oslo) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my dad bought an iPhone. I've spent the better part of the last six months teaching him how to check his email and online newspapers. FML

by anonymas / 01/29/2010 at 10:29am / Norway (Troms) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up with a hangover. I had a party last night. Besides a stolen TV, someone seemingly decided to take a dump in my piano. FML

by Anonymous / 01/28/2010 at 6:00am / Norway (Telemark) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

by Adrian16 / 01/18/2010 at 6:01am / Norway (Vestfold) / Miscellaneous

Today, while standing by the kitchen window I noticed a mouse running across our lawn on top of the snow. I called my two daughters to come see it, but by the time they got to the window a hawk was shredding the poor thing to pieces. My kids didn't stop crying for two hours. FML

by motheroftwo / 01/06/2010 at 3:41am / Norway (Oslo) / Animals

Today, I was sitting on the bus to the gym. I saw that an old woman needed help to get off the bus, so I got up, and helped her off. When I had finally got her down the stairs the bus closed the doors and drove away. I was in the middle of nowhere and the bus drove away with all my things. FML

by busmanhoe / 12/14/2009 at 6:19am / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm travelling to England for an important meeting. I'm Norwegian, and my name is Bård. I have to introduce myself as bored the whole day, because that's how my name is pronounced. FML

by Anonymous / 12/08/2009 at 7:10am / Norway (Rogaland) / Work

Today, my girlfriend woke up very early in terrible pain. I drove her to the hospital and fell asleep in the waiting area. When I woke up, my car was gone and it was 9am. She had assumed I just walked home (32 miles), so she took the car. I was the only one in the waiting area. FML

by nolips / 11/19/2009 at 10:53am / Norway (Oslo) / Transportation

Today, I interviewed potential employees for a job position that I was supposed to get promoted to. FML

by NCanalyst / 11/11/2009 at 3:28pm / Norway (Oslo) / Work

Today, I realized that the only thing I learned from my first serious relationship was how to fake an orgasm. FML

by kjirut / 10/27/2009 at 2:49pm / Norway (Oslo) / Intimacy