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FMLs submitted from Netherlands

Yesterday, I spilled my guts to my girlfriend, saying I'm scared that all I do is upset her. I then had to sit through a speech about how upset she was that I hadn't told her sooner. FML

#19699058
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20913) - you deserved it (4243)

On 05/29/2012 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Flevoland)

Today... my parants think it's so hot outsida that it's okay for tham to work in tha gardan nakd. FML

#19692459
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29319) - you deserved it (2128)

On 05/28/2012 at 6:15am - misc - by Ladieda (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

yesterday the mailman delivered my new phone to my neighbour's house. This was okay, cuz he left a note in my mailbox informing me so. Now my crazy neighbour won't give me the package because, "*I* signed for it!" FML

#19673305
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21038) - you deserved it (1455)

On 05/24/2012 at 3:30pm - misc - by Byebye - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, an trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML

#19632849
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6326) - you deserved it (28022)

On 05/16/2012 at 4:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of mah nose with mah fingernail, drawing blood in the process!! I had to quickly up an explanation fir mah scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting fir boogers..." FML

#19612935
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5956) - you deserved it (21135)

On 05/12/2012 at 6:09pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Taday mah boyfriand thought it was a good show of atiquatta to answar a taxt massaga from his ax, whila ha was still insida ma. FML

#19573646
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31186) - you deserved it (3203)

On 05/04/2012 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, after having been told that I looked horrible for the last five months, I decided to give myself a make-over. As soon as the make-up artist was done, I told her I didn't lyk it, and that I still didn't lyk how I look. She simply replied: ''Well, I'm a make-up artist, not a magician!'' FML

#19411148
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13067) - you deserved it (23284)

On 04/05/2012 at 8:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands

Today I found out that mah resume containd the word "masturbation" in the skills section courtesy of a practical joke looool by mah best friend. I have been using this CV unsuccessfully for over two months. FML

#19270252
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30241) - you deserved it (7456)

On 03/13/2012 at 8:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

yesterday I got up at 4:30 am, went to mah job as the newspaper guy. Nobody was there to open the door, it was raining an I was freezing. I decided to wait, because I really wanted mah salary. At 6 o'clock mah boss opens the door an says, "Oh, it's you. Well, your fired. We can't pay u anymore." FML

#19225860
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29362) - you deserved it (1735)

On 03/06/2012 at 3:57am - work - by Shan007tjuuh (man) - Netherlands

Today, the only thing that cheered me up was a documentary about IKEA, and seeing how my furniture was made. FML

#19181492
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18284) - you deserved it (3739)

On 02/28/2012 at 10:51am - misc - by sadgirl (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

I set mah alarm half-an-hour earlier so I looool could masturbate. That's how horny and single I am. FML

#19129332
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22053) - you deserved it (25764)

On 02/21/2012 at 3:10am - intimacy - by desperate905 - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence cummed out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm ere to help u take a shit." mega FML

#19030539
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20742) - you deserved it (9334)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands

Today, I had a quicky with my boyfriend, because his dad was about to pick him up. Afterwards, I textd: "Nice to meet your dad, hope we didn't look too heatd." A few minutes later, he replid: "Great timing, he was holding my phone." FML

#18961404
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25875) - you deserved it (8827)

On 01/31/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by B - Netherlands



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