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FMLs submitted from Netherlands

Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML

#21164043
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53101) - you deserved it (3857)

On 06/05/2014 at 4:05pm - kids - by bastards (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my brain-dead brother-in-law decided to play five finger fillet while at my place. Predictably, he ended up slicing a finger wide open. My mother-in-law now wants my blood, because she thinks I dared him to do it, and that clearly her perfect little angel couldn't be such a moron. FML

#21134881
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39240) - you deserved it (3507)

On 05/09/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by fmlgirl (woman) - Netherlands (Zeeland)

Today, I had to take the train from my hometown to my university for a very important meeting concerning my foreign exchange program. When I finally arrived, I noticed a Post-it on the door: "Meeting cancelled, sick". I basically made a 9-hour day-trip for a half-an-hour walk. FML

#21100831
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36736) - you deserved it (3413)

On 03/31/2014 at 7:49am - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Zeeland)

Today, I realized I'm so scared of my manager that I don't even dare to quit my job. The same job I want to quit exactly because I'm so scared of her. FML

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

#21049445
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45237) - you deserved it (3433)

On 02/03/2014 at 4:16pm - misc - by jai90 (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, as I was driving back home from my grandma's, I looked over at the guy in the lane beside me, only to witness him with a sandwich between his teeth and his cock in his free hand. Now I know why I don't leave the city, or even drive, more often. FML

#21006441
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40388) - you deserved it (4155)

On 12/26/2013 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by NNTA (woman) - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, it was safe to say I started sleepwalking again, after I woke up with a mouth filled with soil and a ravaged plant. FML

#20995711
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38665) - you deserved it (3416)

On 12/17/2013 at 10:38am - health - by adventurousnightsbutnotinagoodway (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I found out the hard way that my boyfriend and mother have been sending each other sexually-explicit picture messages. FML

Today, I bought a cat. Somehow that cat is now stuck inside my antique piano. I have to break the piano to get her out. FML

Today, I got sent home early because a large fire broke out at work. I was greeted by the sight of my cocktard of a "boyfriend" making out on my sofa with another woman. He actually had the audacity and brass balls to claim he thought she was me. FML

#20842035
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57205) - you deserved it (3884)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:40pm - love - by why yes, I do mean "ex-boyfriend" (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

#20822450
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51115) - you deserved it (4856)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by NO NO NO (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my boyfriend and I were spooning in bed, nude, when I accidentally farted. He freaked out and asked in all seriousness if I was trying to give his dick pink-eye. FML

#20813792
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46980) - you deserved it (7688)

On 07/31/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by -_____- (woman) - Netherlands

Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML

#20790603
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59141) - you deserved it (6318)

On 07/18/2013 at 3:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Limburg)



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