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FMLs submitted from Ireland

Today, I went to the gym to try to get into shape. While I was running on the treadmill, my beer belly pushed against the emergency stop button, twice. FML

#21427019
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25699) - you deserved it (4854)

On 06/16/2015 at 1:27pm - health - by Iarla_ceapaire93 - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my housemate got back at me for asking for her share of a bill by losing her virginity to the guy I like, very loudly. FML

#21423445
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26305) - you deserved it (2012)

On 06/09/2015 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Ireland

Today, I went to the living room where my mother was so I could ask her about something. I found her lying pantsless on the couch trying to cut her pubic hair with a pair of scissors. FML

#21422975
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26166) - you deserved it (1862)

On 06/08/2015 at 7:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

#21407745
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31746) - you deserved it (5551)

On 05/10/2015 at 11:35am - intimacy - by YouDontSay (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I tried to write a bad review for the fast-food place at which I work part-time. My username made me anonymous, but I forgot to change my profile picture. Now my manager and coworkers won't even speak to me. FML

#21405584
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10794) - you deserved it (40076)

On 05/06/2015 at 10:34am - work - by Freelman - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare for it, though. I failed because somebody sneezed during it and I said "bless you." Apparently, that's classed as cheating. FML

Today, I was staying at my boyfriend's house while he was at work, and put on his pants to make some tea. As I took my hot tea and laptop upstairs, the pants slowly started to fall down. I had to keep climbing with my pants around my knees, and shuffle awkwardly past my boyfriend's father. FML

#21399154
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25078) - you deserved it (7716)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:38pm - misc - by Bullet4MyChemaMo - Ireland (Cork)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML

#21399079
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37839) - you deserved it (2463)

On 04/24/2015 at 3:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Laois)

Today, my 13-year-old sister told me that she wants to get pregnant soon to stop her periods for a while. I can't believe we're related. FML

Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML

#21382327
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28586) - you deserved it (3036)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:29am - kids - by njh - Ireland

Today, while studying for a big test at the library, some idiots started playing hide-and-seek. After putting up with their snorting and giggling for nearly an hour, I finally lost my shit and told them to knock it off. I then got kicked out for causing a disturbance. FML

#21380708
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27849) - you deserved it (3541)

On 03/24/2015 at 12:51pm - misc - by faaail - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

#21355947
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32131) - you deserved it (10455)

On 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, I experienced the horror of walking in on my best friend fondling his tits. Yes, "his". FML

#21351065
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27678) - you deserved it (2940)

On 02/06/2015 at 6:00pm - misc - by barf (woman) - Ireland



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