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FMLs submitted from Iceland

Today, at work I had to explain to a client that male dogs can wear red collars and it doesn't make them "gay". The client then got angry and stormed out of the store, causing me to get written up. FML

#21153154
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41967) - you deserved it (4391)

On 05/27/2014 at 7:15am - animals - by Holyguacamoly (woman) - Iceland

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

#21051355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41546) - you deserved it (21600)

On 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Evolution mama (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, my mom made me go shopping with her. It was freezing out, but she didn't wear a coat, boasting that she doesn't feel the chill like I do. By the time we drove home she was whining about freezing to death, and now I'm stuck in a house whose heating is set to "inferno". FML

#21035197
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38292) - you deserved it (3773)

On 01/21/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland

Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML

#20917903
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42406) - you deserved it (23908)

On 10/12/2013 at 6:03pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland (Borgarfjardarsysla)

Today, I went to the movies with my husband and our 6-year-old son. My husband kept stealing popcorn from the guy next to him, to the point where the guy punched him in the face. The movie was stopped, the police were called, and my son is now inconsolable. FML

#20881087
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45164) - you deserved it (5132)

On 09/14/2013 at 3:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

#20684142
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67095) - you deserved it (5627)

On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

#20466782
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26420) - you deserved it (14099)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Today, while walking home, I really had to pee, so I decided to do my business in some high grass just off the street. When I got home, I felt an itch between my butt cheeks. I went to the bathroom to check it out, and a dead, apparently crushed spider fell out of my underwear. FML

#20147226
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17936) - you deserved it (11691)

On 11/04/2012 at 12:12pm - animals - by spiderwoman (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, I got a phone call from my 6-year-old son's school telling me they were concerned about him as he wouldn't stop barking at the radiator. After talking to my husband about it, I found out he's been teaching him so he could see the look on my face. FML

#20121395
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19646) - you deserved it (1778)

On 10/17/2012 at 7:00pm - kids - by Uproar - Iceland

Today, my son and I attended the funeral of a family friend. It went as well as any funeral could, up until the point that my apparently drunk son tried to grope the widow. I came an inch away from causing my son to need his own funeral. FML

#19834140
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22098) - you deserved it (2344)

On 06/23/2012 at 1:43pm - kids - by nosonofmine (man) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, the couple downstairs decided they wanted to try a home birth. FML

#17064956
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41844) - you deserved it (3826)

On 07/11/2011 at 10:24am - kids - by cocacoola (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)

Today, I finally found out what the weird sour smell that's been in my dorm room for a while is. My roommate's sweat. FML

#15673265
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (2574)

On 04/06/2011 at 11:12pm - misc - by thatstinks - Iceland



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