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FMLs submitted from Germany

Today, I went to the Salvation Army to donate some clothes. As I was handing over the 4 huge bags that I had carried for 10 blocks, while 6 months pregnant, somebody stole my purse. FML

#14211022
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36198) - you deserved it (3057)

On 12/15/2010 at 6:58am - misc - by mugged (woman) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I said to my wife that I wished I had met her 20 years ago. Her response was, "Twenty years ago I had beautiful tits and many options, I wouldn't have even looked at you." FML

#14140918
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36460) - you deserved it (4820)

On 12/09/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by prinzess (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I held a presentation about my masters thesis. Turns out, my professor never ever actually read the drafts I'd given him, but decided to rip me to pieces in front of everyone, saying that the topic isn't worth researching. I've been working on it for six months. FML

#14128873
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28521) - you deserved it (2108)

On 12/08/2010 at 5:30am - work - by nograd4mee (woman) - Germany

Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML

#13930948
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31241) - you deserved it (4356)

On 11/21/2010 at 10:42pm - animals - by dickwebs - Germany

Today, my girlfriend and I were lying in her bed. We fooled around and were about to have sex as she suddenly began to cry without any reason. She cried for 30 minutes until I finally managed to calm her down. She said there was no reason for her crying. Then she fell asleep. FML

#13830899
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27763) - you deserved it (4119)

On 11/13/2010 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I realized that the only boy who ever called me pretty was my 5-year-old brother. My sister then scolded him for lying. FML

#13825613
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27094) - you deserved it (2542)

On 11/13/2010 at 9:25am - kids - by blueheron93 (woman) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I failed to get my drivers licence. My father was the instructor. FML

#13701806
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15050) - you deserved it (16653)

On 11/03/2010 at 1:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)

Today, my boyfriend told me that if he was to break up with me, he would do it in a crowded location so I couldn't start to cry or make a scene. FML

#13685812
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22868) - you deserved it (4173)

On 11/02/2010 at 8:11am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)

Today, I found out the man I'm getting a ride from drives a windowless van and is "excited to see me". My friends had encouraged me to sign up for the cheap-ride program because it was less expensive than taking a train. If I never come back, look for a windowless van somewhere in Europe. FML

#13432201
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19249) - you deserved it (4257)

On 10/13/2010 at 8:57am - misc - by deadinavan (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, whilst working as a language assistant in Germany as part of my degree, some 9 year-old German kids asked me to please speak English to them because my German was so poor. FML

#13139163
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10864) - you deserved it (14201)

On 09/21/2010 at 3:10am - kids - by themildthings (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, after almost a week of being bed-ridden with a bad flu, my mom told me it was my job to clean the house. When I told her I still had a fever and didn't feel well, she looked at me and said in an understanding voice "It's okay honey, you can do it slowly." FML

#12852856
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26257) - you deserved it (4359)

On 09/01/2010 at 10:41am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I realised that my flight back from Berlin was actually booked for the 29th of September instead of August. FML

#12818832
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9972) - you deserved it (19886)

On 08/30/2010 at 7:40am - misc - by Palf - Germany (Brandenburg)

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years finally asked me to marry him. He said: We could save taxes if we married.. what do you think? That was the most romantic thing he said to me in the last 2 years. FML

#12768911
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24821) - you deserved it (8529)

On 08/27/2010 at 5:57am - love - by weddinggirl (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)



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