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FMLs submitted from France

Today, I spent the night in hospital. As soon as I was alone, I writhed and twisted in all directions in my attempts to pee in a bottle left precisely for that purpose. It was at that moment that the doctor, a good-looking guy, came in. My legs were spread wide and I was right in the middle of doing my business. FML

#338
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25530) - you deserved it (2504)

On 11/19/2008 at 12:59am - health - by la poisse - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was making love with my girlfriend and my landline rang. Obviously, I let it go to voicemail. At the very moment I was about to cum, I heard my mum's voice on my voicemail: "Hi sweetheart!" FML

#337
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41733) - you deserved it (4048)

On 11/18/2008 at 11:58pm - intimacy - by Gwayhir - Sent from mobile version

Today, I tried demonstrate to my little brother that, unlike what he sees in cartoons, it is impossible to slip on a banana peel. I'm not too sure he's convinced. FML

#336
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7483) - you deserved it (30595)

On 11/18/2008 at 10:44pm - kids - by j0j0 - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I was on a date with my new boyfriend. I acted very flirty and laughed very loudly to show him how funny he was. I laughed so loudly that I farted. FML

#329
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24981) - you deserved it (17282)

On 11/18/2008 at 7:16am - love - by elsaza - Sent from mobile version

Today, when I threw away my cigarette out of the car window, the wind blew it back in again. My trousers got completely burnt. FML

#327
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7192) - you deserved it (60252)

On 11/18/2008 at 5:37am - misc - by brebis - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML

#326
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29883) - you deserved it (8127)

On 11/18/2008 at 2:36am - love - by Otherguy - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I do every morning, I woke up and gave my dog, who sleeps next to me, a kiss on the nose. Except that this morning he had been sleeping the other way round. I kissed him on the arse. FML

#325
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21944) - you deserved it (21132)

On 11/18/2008 at 1:42am - animals - by AgathedeBlouse - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was on a train, sitting next to an old man who was reading a newspaper. Suddenly, he sneezed without putting his hands over his nose. Instead of turning towards the window, he turned towards me. FML

#324
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23011) - you deserved it (1541)

On 11/17/2008 at 11:42pm - misc - by ... - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was in an online chatroom speaking to this girl that I really hit it off with. She then confided in me that she'd recently been dumped by her boyfriend and that he was a jerk. A little while later, we exchanged photos. It was my ex. FML

#321
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42390) - you deserved it (7874)

On 11/17/2008 at 6:27am - love - by Darkheaven - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had an important appointment for a job. During the interview, my cellphone rang. My ringtone is "Denver, the last Dinosaur". FML

#320
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6545) - you deserved it (25073)

On 11/17/2008 at 4:54am - work - by Dothy - France (Aquitaine)

Today, my 10 year old brother won the poem contest at his school. Since then he won’t stop bugging me with them. FML

#319
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18596) - you deserved it (7031)

On 11/17/2008 at 3:53am - kids - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I took my driving test. I spent 30 minutes with the handbrake on. FML

#317
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9635) - you deserved it (23248)

On 11/17/2008 at 1:02am - misc - by nightput - France (Pays de la Loire)

Today, I put on the same jeans that I had left in a bundle in my bedroom the day before. A few hours later, my boxer shorts decided to make their spectacular reappearance trick at the bottom of my leg in the middle of one of my meetings. FML

#316
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18153) - you deserved it (9505)

On 11/17/2008 at 12:04am - work - by Tomtom - Sent from mobile version



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