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FMLs submitted from France

Today, I'm a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. On new years, my mom called and asked what kind of champagne I want. FML

#771
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22144) - you deserved it (2956)

On 01/01/2009 at 10:38am - health - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. I look him straight in the eye and ask him: "What's the first thing you think about when you look at me?". His answer: "Can I finish my steak?" FML

#656
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17649) - you deserved it (6953)

On 01/01/2009 at 7:09am - love - by Undefined - Sent from mobile version

Today, and for the last 8 months my upstairs neighbours have been making a tremendous noise. I finally decided to go up to complain: "The amount of noise you make is unbelievable ! It sounds like you're driving tractors up here!". The woman replies: "My husband is paraplegic..." FML

#654
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16511) - you deserved it (7788)

On 01/01/2009 at 3:49am - misc - by Jared - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend has big fake boobs, but gets offended when I tell her how much I like them. FML

#769
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34593) - you deserved it (5540)

On 01/01/2009 at 12:23am - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went onto my computer and found a cyber sex conversation between my sister and my girlfriend. FML

#768
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33019) - you deserved it (2532)

On 12/31/2008 at 10:49pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, my wife and I both have blond hair and blue eyes, we just had a red headed son. FML

#767
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35810) - you deserved it (7607)

On 12/31/2008 at 10:45pm - kids - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML

#766
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46695) - you deserved it (2301)

On 12/31/2008 at 6:41pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I crashed my car racing backwards and told my parents I was rear ended. They made me call the police and file a report. I hope there were no cameras. FML

#765
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4282) - you deserved it (38896)

On 12/31/2008 at 1:23pm - misc - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, the incredibly handsome, talented, hilarious, and intelligent man that I've fallen head over heels like no other for is gay. FML

#764
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23300) - you deserved it (3549)

On 12/31/2008 at 1:03pm - love - by Noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, I attended a speed dating evening. After 7 minutes, the girl told me she wasn't interested. I asked her at what point of the conversation she had made up her mind, she answered: "When you said 'Hello'. Goodbye". FML

#639
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17508) - you deserved it (1927)

On 12/30/2008 at 10:48pm - misc - by Aintnosunshine - Sent from mobile version

Today, my first (and only true) date ended with the girl saying "Thanks for dinner, I was hungry - and oh, by the way, I'm a lesbian". FML

#763
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27039) - you deserved it (1942)

On 12/30/2008 at 10:21pm - love - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I am spending new year absolutely alone. My girlfriend canceled our plans the day before so she could spend it with alcohol and strangers. Somehow, I still love her. FML

#762
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21974) - you deserved it (9426)

On 12/30/2008 at 8:36pm - love - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, when I saw a big box that looked like a playstation, I got really excited and my parents were there and everything looked like it really was something big, so I start to open the wrapper and surprise... it was a lamp. FML

#759
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18215) - you deserved it (5934)

On 12/30/2008 at 3:30pm - money - by - Sent from mobile version



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