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FMLs submitted from France

Today, my boss asked me "can I give you some constructive criticism?". I said yes. He tells me "Your work is really shit. You have no talent and I can't figure out why I hired you." FML

#576
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18287) - you deserved it (2026)

On 12/22/2008 at 11:18pm - work - by crapules - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decide to go to my ex-girlfriend's house to bring her stuff back. I broke up with her earlier this week after a 2 year relationship, and I'd hoped she would have realized her mistake and ask me to stay for a bit and talk. I ring the doorbell and her new boyfriend opens the door. FML

#572
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13610) - you deserved it (6064)

On 12/22/2008 at 6:54am - love - by noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answer: 'Well, you don't kiss me often either!". So now she keeps kissing me. FML

#570
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5803) - you deserved it (26290)

On 12/22/2008 at 2:45am - love - by Julian - Sent from mobile version

Today, someone stole both rear view mirrors from my scooter. And where was the police? They were 500m down the road, waiting to stop me for not having any mirrors. FML

#569
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19956) - you deserved it (1059)

On 12/22/2008 at 12:43am - money - by daddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm 65 years old, and I've been given a bottle of wine produced in the year I was born. The wine tastes foul; not a good omen. FML

#563
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13135) - you deserved it (1488)

On 12/21/2008 at 7:14am - misc - by Phil - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend told me that she woke up after yesterday’s party with someone else’s trousers. FML

#562
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14351) - you deserved it (1144)

On 12/21/2008 at 4:40am - love - by Yudor - Sent from mobile version

Today, I played a table tennis final in public. After winning, I went to shake my opponent's hand. He doesn't react or move. It was only the first set. FML

#560
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8667) - you deserved it (6552)

On 12/21/2008 at 2:00am - misc - by Bito - Sent from mobile version

Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML

#559
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12540) - you deserved it (1256)

On 12/21/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by Loola - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML

#557
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14048) - you deserved it (4640)

On 12/20/2008 at 7:23am - kids - by Lola - Sent from mobile version

Today, I opened a packet of cereal and it exploded on my keyboard; now, my keyboard crackles. FML

#556
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9501) - you deserved it (6679)

On 12/20/2008 at 3:16am - misc - by Rabzouz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up beside a disgusting guy I didn't know. He told me he was the best friend of the handsome guy I was hitting on yesterday evening. I can't remember at which point I got mislead into bringing the wrong one home. FML

#555
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3759) - you deserved it (17043)

On 12/20/2008 at 12:50am - misc - by elo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42915) - you deserved it (4633)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got ready to stay over at my boyfriend's house. I brought food, new lingerie, and I got a bikini wax. I did stay overnight, but I was holding a bucket for him because he had gastroenteritis. FML

#550
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15177) - you deserved it (1689)

On 12/19/2008 at 12:41am - love - by Carla J. - Sent from mobile version



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