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FMLs submitted from France

Today, in the forest, I hit my foot against a half-buried metal thing. I dug into the ground, and found a beautiful box, heavy enough to not be empty. I imagined myself with gold coins. Inside was the corpse of a cat. FML

#1817
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24761) - you deserved it (5662)

On 01/20/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by mainche - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered that Paolo has a big penis, that he's good in bed and that the hotel sheets still remember it all. Mum, the walls won't get any thicker just 'cause you're on the telephone. FML

#1813
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22256) - you deserved it (1654)

On 01/20/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to an underwear shop, and an employee recommended me a push-up bra. I was wearing one. FML

#1427
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21603) - you deserved it (2056)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:31am - misc - by Pakundo - Sent from mobile version

Today, the only girl I really loved said to me: I want you to be the father of my child, but I don't want to be your girlfriend. FML

#1230
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25429) - you deserved it (1657)

On 01/15/2009 at 11:12am - love - by J.Smith - Sent from mobile version

Today, wanting to change from the usual pizza/coca cola menu, I decide to cook. After spending 1h30 making a "beef chili with ancho, mole, and cumin" I sprinkle a bit of salt on top of it. The top came off the salt. I think it's back to pizzas for me. FML

#1229
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18706) - you deserved it (3093)

On 01/15/2009 at 11:00am - health - by j0j0 - France (Aquitaine)

Today, my husband called me “my little zebra”. I gave birth a month ago, and I’ve kept a few stretch marks. FML

#1058
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24339) - you deserved it (2105)

On 01/14/2009 at 1:33am - love - by noname - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I got together with a small gathering of friends in a bar. I go up to the bar to order something, but with all the music and noise, the barman can't hear what I'm trying to say, so he leans forward, cocking his ear towards me. For some reason, I thought he was being friendly so I kissed him as if we were saying hello to each other. FML

#1056
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8959) - you deserved it (17306)

On 01/14/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Ad-s - Sent from mobile version

Today, a work colleague announced that she is organising a bit of a party. She says, in front of everyone, that I'm not invited to "avoid ruining the vibe". FML

#1030
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19253) - you deserved it (2143)

On 01/13/2009 at 11:43am - work - by Plush - Sent from mobile version

Today, like every other day, I turn up at work at the security guard's gate to show my ID badge. Except that my brother had stuck a huge "FBI" sticker on it. My co-workers now all call me Mulder. FML

#1020
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14644) - you deserved it (2493)

On 01/13/2009 at 4:47am - work - by MAC - Sent from mobile version

Today, I saw a friend in the street but he didn't see me, so as a joke I decided to ring him. He took his mobile out of his pocket, sighed and didn't pick up. FML

#1016
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30646) - you deserved it (2763)

On 01/12/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by patty - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I came out of some changing rooms in a clothes shop, I gave back all the stuff I'd tried on to a saleswoman. I then walk off, make it about a couple of yards, change my mind and decide to purchase one of the items I'd tried. When I get back, the saleswoman was spraying the changing room I'd used with deodorant. FML

#1015
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14192) - you deserved it (8448)

On 01/12/2009 at 8:35pm - misc - by carla - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, my mother bought me Mickey Mouse shaped burgers for my dinner. I'm 19. FML

#998
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15274) - you deserved it (5611)

On 01/12/2009 at 10:56am - misc - by ana9 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 5 year old daughter watched me getting dressed in the bathroom and asked "mum, when my boobs grow, will they droop like yours?". FML

#983
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25085) - you deserved it (2886)

On 01/12/2009 at 4:37am - kids - by Lax - Sent from mobile version



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