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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from France

Today, I was using the only stall left in a public restroom; a handicap stall. As I sat down to do my business, I felt something warm dripping down my leg. I looked down to see me urinating on myself through the raised seat. FML

#6075541
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8953) - you deserved it (28701)

On 10/30/2009 at 9:36pm - misc - by JynxQueen - Sent from mobile version

Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my nose. I wasn't driving. I walked right into it. It was parked. FML

#6002557
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11077) - you deserved it (40983)

On 10/26/2009 at 2:35am - misc - by munchkin - Sent from mobile version

Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML

#5987362
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42418) - you deserved it (4969)

On 10/25/2009 at 5:06am - kids - by oh dear - Sent from mobile version

Today, I received a three-time forwarded message which I thought would turn out to be a random chain message. Turns out my boyfriend didn't want to send me the "break-up text" himself and figured it would get to me eventually after sending it to all my best friends. FML

#5984352
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35795) - you deserved it (2396)

On 10/25/2009 at 12:36am - love - by Kalaina - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML

#5942211
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55976) - you deserved it (3078)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:30am - misc - by scarred - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that I lie to my friends online and go "offline" for hours at a time so it appears that I have a life outside of the internet. FML

#5942193
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13285) - you deserved it (33702)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by Kimberly - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was in bed, thinking about my crush and playing with myself, when I remembered the complicated spreadsheet my boss asked me to make tomorrow. That got me more excited than the thought of my crush. FML

#5932457
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18225) - you deserved it (6832)

On 10/21/2009 at 6:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, in front of a bunch of people on my college campus, my mom grabbed my hand and lead me across the street. I'm 20. FML

#5912690
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35973) - you deserved it (4584)

On 10/20/2009 at 1:11pm - misc - by Watchyourstep - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went on a date with an awesome guy. I got super hammered and punched him in the face. FML

#5894935
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8985) - you deserved it (60219)

On 10/19/2009 at 11:42am - love - by DrunkGirl - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was texting my boyfriend, making plans to see him tomorrow. He ended the conversation by saying "I'm changing my sheets tomorrow, so take a shower." FML

#5892198
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21684) - you deserved it (6080)

On 10/19/2009 at 3:26am - intimacy - by Shower? - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML

#5885863
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27029) - you deserved it (6694)

On 10/18/2009 at 9:11pm - animals - by Mary - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML

#5868589
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46279) - you deserved it (4870)

On 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm - kids - by hamster cookie - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was in a hurry to get to work and I put on yesterday's jeans. While at my meeting an employee asked me if 'that' was mine and pointed to something on the floor next to me. Which was yesterday's underwear. FML

#5850843
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13366) - you deserved it (29588)

On 10/16/2009 at 12:30pm - misc - by Sbfreak510 - Sent from mobile version



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