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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from France

Today, I had dinner on my own. My cat came and sat on the chair on the other side of the table. We stared at each other during the whole meal. Pathetic. FML

#4050
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29805) - you deserved it (4244)

On 01/31/2009 at 10:03am - animals - by JulleandCici - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML

#2620
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6637) - you deserved it (51357)

On 01/26/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by Timmy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I go. I then return with another pair for him to try on, and find him bent over and blurt out "What the hell's that terrible underwear?". The man turns around, revealing that I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML

#2607
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15266) - you deserved it (7937)

On 01/26/2009 at 5:09am - love - by Harmonia - Sent from mobile version

Today, a ball rolled up to me, so I picked it up and threw it over the school wall. A little boy who was behind me asked for his ball back. It's Sunday and the school is closed. FML

#2505
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7235) - you deserved it (30578)

On 01/25/2009 at 7:36am - misc - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 19 year old girlfriend dumped me because she thinks I'm immature. I'm 30. FML

#2154
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7988) - you deserved it (55434)

On 01/22/2009 at 7:06am - love - by Benji - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm looking for a job, and the employer I spoke to by phone was busy, but before hanging up he said "we will call you soon". I still wonder how he plans to do so without even having asked for my number. FML

#2053
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17449) - you deserved it (2049)

On 01/21/2009 at 12:03pm - love - by maddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, a girl was coming on to me throughout an entire concert, giving me drinks. At the end of the evening, she gave me her MSN address so that we could do other things together. Thanks to all the drinks I'd had, I forgot her address. FML

#2030
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6081) - you deserved it (22664)

On 01/21/2009 at 9:23am - love - by Trash - Sent from mobile version

Today, I broke the glass of the photocopier trying to photocopy my ass. My boss will be here in five hours. She'll know it was me. I'm the only night guardian. FML

#1986
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5381) - you deserved it (40679)

On 01/21/2009 at 5:03am - work - by Wititipwitpwit - Sent from mobile version

Today, I get home and there's a package waiting for me. I ordered something online 2 weeks ago for a girl I like. She's not available anymore. No refunds. FML

#1976
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16829) - you deserved it (4682)

On 01/21/2009 at 1:59am - love - by Dudeman5000 - Sent from mobile version

Today, me and my family watched the video of my birth. In the video, when my mother sees me for the first time, she says "God he's ugly!" FML

#1975
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27738) - you deserved it (2001)

On 01/21/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by mat - Sent from mobile version

Today, I've been dating a girl for a year and she's only touched my penis twice. Once by accident. FML

#1883
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23113) - you deserved it (10414)

On 01/20/2009 at 11:52am - love - by jobless - Sent from mobile version

Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: “I’m keeping them just in case...”- “In case of what?”- “In case I want to dress up like an asshole”. FML

#1859
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8369) - you deserved it (23647)

On 01/20/2009 at 9:01am - love - by dude - Sent from mobile version

Today, the phone rang. I run to get the call, I trip, fall on a metal chair. Tears in my eyes and out of breath I pick up... "Hi, do you have a minute to answer a few questions? It's for a survey." FML

#1820
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17242) - you deserved it (3604)

On 01/20/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by Kika - Sent from mobile version



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