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FMLs submitted from France

Today, I was nervous as hell for my driving test. The instructor told me to drive a straight line in reverse. I forgot to put the car in reverse from drive and drove straight into a parked vehicle. Which happened to be owned by the instructor. FML

#7290738
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12161) - you deserved it (27241)

On 01/11/2010 at 11:03pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
187 comments

Today, I saw what I thought was a gallon jug of water. Trying to do something spontaneous and fun, I took my hardest swing at it to see how far I could kick it. It was frozen solid. I broke my foot. FML

#7261047
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7798) - you deserved it (41789)

On 01/10/2010 at 4:46pm - misc - by tnt007 - France

Today, I spent an hour and a half trying to rid my house of smoke and burnt plastic smell because my little sister didn't know she was supposed to add water in the package of microwaveable mac and cheese. FML

#7235673
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23811) - you deserved it (3088)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:45pm - misc - by Justaddwater - France

Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfiend of nine months. She's making a lot of noise so I tell her to keep it down and remind her my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later I get a text from my sister saying my parents want to make sure I'm wearing a condom. FML

#7222558
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9833) - you deserved it (26717)

On 01/08/2010 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by awskme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

#7212033
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37209) - you deserved it (3116)

On 01/08/2010 at 2:23am - kids - by PeanutlyDisabled - France

Today, I was sparring with a guy in my Tae Kwon Do class. He had a hard-on the entire time we were sparring. FML

#7211389
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30372) - you deserved it (3802)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:30am - misc - by snickerdoodles - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that while I was on vacation my neighbor had let my brother into my apartment. I don't have a brother. FML

#7203550
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35331) - you deserved it (1997)

On 01/07/2010 at 7:21pm - misc - by Darkness162000 - France

Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML

#7175057
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28673) - you deserved it (4447)

On 01/06/2010 at 12:53am - love - by drunkdial - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML

#7165792
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39878) - you deserved it (13902)

On 01/05/2010 at 5:03pm - love - by leigh2812 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was rejected for a job I really wanted, they said I didn't have enough experience. I designed the systems they are implementing. FML

#7158540
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37739) - you deserved it (1943)

On 01/05/2010 at 2:16am - work - by Me - France

Today, I was in a hurry to catch a plane. I got half way to the airport and realized I forgot my phone. I drove back to the house and searched for it. I finally gave up and returned to the airport only to find that I was 10 minutes late for my plane. Just then my pocket vibrated. FML

#7158067
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10106) - you deserved it (38469)

On 01/05/2010 at 1:40am - misc - by Allen - France

Today, it was the first time my boyfriend had seen me naked. He grabs my breasts and then begins to sing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts." He is 22. FML

#7152531
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22379) - you deserved it (5800)

On 01/04/2010 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by ambermcnulty - Sent from mobile version



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