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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from France

Today, my boyfriend called and told me he had cheated on me with a minor. She is claiming rape and going to put him in jail. He asked me to help him pay for his attorney. FML

#13496641
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41365) - you deserved it (3540)

On 10/18/2010 at 8:03am - love - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to see Jackass 3 in 3D. While the previews were playing, some guy sitting next to me leaned over and began telling me what happens in every scene, completely ruining the movie for me. He tried to get my number afterwards. FML

#13470194
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31224) - you deserved it (4041)

On 10/16/2010 at 9:14am - misc - by dcait_1196 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML

#13466468
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41845) - you deserved it (3503)

On 10/16/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Shooter71 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was called up about a job I'd recently applied for. I was overly excited to tell them I'd be there on Monday. Then I remembered I canceled my car insurance due to financial difficulties. I have no way of getting there. FML

#13446439
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20575) - you deserved it (7782)

On 10/14/2010 at 3:02pm - work - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up to a broken window and 3 guys sitting in my living room watching TV. FML

#13413623
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34495) - you deserved it (2660)

On 10/11/2010 at 11:06pm - misc - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I tried to jump between the train doors to make it in on time. And missed. FML

#13391537
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10935) - you deserved it (24092)

On 10/10/2010 at 11:16am - misc - by Icey_dan1 - Sent from mobile version

Today, at work I asked a woman how she was doing. When she replied, I didn't understand her, and instead of asking her what she said, I just replied with, "oh that's good." What she told me that I didn't understand was that her husband had just died. FML

#13383180
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8759) - you deserved it (29271)

On 10/09/2010 at 8:51pm - work - by fistpumpin4life - Sent from mobile version

Today, I learned the hard way that leaving eye drops in your car all day makes them scorching hot. FML

#13367996
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11806) - you deserved it (35711)

On 10/08/2010 at 5:30pm - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was working my shift at the restaurant as a waiter when the girl I've been in love with for 4 years came in with her boyfriend. He asked me to hide the ring in their dessert. FML

#13365724
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44442) - you deserved it (6292)

On 10/08/2010 at 12:55pm - love - by ringhider (man) - France (Lorraine)

Today, I was making my bed which would normally be a simple task, until I leaned into the wooden foot of my bed, and put my entire body weight on my left nut. FML

#13364492
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22607) - you deserved it (9726)

On 10/08/2010 at 6:53am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I sit here in agonizing pain because of a scoliosis surgery. I have a bunch of painkillers that I need to suppress this incredible back pain. Looks like I can't take any. My mom has hidden them from me because she THINKS I need to be taken off them. I wish my doctor were here. FML

#13363376
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32147) - you deserved it (2319)

On 10/08/2010 at 6:31am - health - by lmastr64 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at Barnes and Noble with my dad, where he refused to buy me a book because I "already read too much." FML

#13359325
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26186) - you deserved it (5544)

On 10/07/2010 at 9:57pm - misc - by hfksorws - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was telling my boyfriend about how self conscious I am and how I obsess about my weight. He said, "Don't be ridiculous, you don't need to lose that much weight." FML

#13344865
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16623) - you deserved it (25913)

On 10/06/2010 at 5:59pm - love - by Username - Sent from mobile version



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