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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from France

Today, I found out the hard way that if you think a waiter is hot, you probably shouldn't tell your parents. They could react by screaming at him across the room to tell him you think he's a hottie. FML

#15203097
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26558) - you deserved it (14522)

On 03/05/2011 at 12:34am - misc - by anonymous - France

Today, my mother noticed that I hadn't taken the trash out in a few weeks and angry, piled various full trash bags on my bed. I've been away on holiday for the past three weeks, I guess she didn't notice that part. FML

#15195848
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31317) - you deserved it (3131)

On 03/04/2011 at 11:25am - misc - by carr (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, thanks to a particularly spicy bowl of noodles, my nose decided it would rather be a fountain. A fountain of blood. FML

#15129596
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26106) - you deserved it (3484)

On 02/26/2011 at 5:59pm - health - by mwja (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML

#15114672
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35447) - you deserved it (6245)

On 02/25/2011 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by unwantedlove (woman) - France

Today, I woke up to a good friend of mine leaving my bed. The very friend I've had a crush on for months, and knows exactly how I feel about him. Everything was great until he said, "Yeah, about last night... It's just that you were there, and I was weak. See ya." FML

#14974628
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36063) - you deserved it (6565)

On 02/14/2011 at 3:25pm - love - by Emily (woman) - France (Auvergne)

Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML

#14955015
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43944) - you deserved it (5954)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:32am - intimacy - by Eva - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

#14921394
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10741) - you deserved it (34019)

On 02/10/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by Jaws (man) - France (Alsace)

Today, and even at this very moment, my ex, who I'm still in love with, is having sex with her new boyfriend. He's my neighbor and she's making a lot more noise with him than she did with me. FML

#14847899
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40247) - you deserved it (6298) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/05/2011 at 1:29am - intimacy - by homerde - Sent from mobile version

Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML

#14768786
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44321) - you deserved it (4003) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2011 at 1:21am - love - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48058) - you deserved it (3946) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27416) - you deserved it (7370) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the supermarket, my mother stopped in the middle of a lane and imitated a gorilla as a way of asking me from far away if I wanted any bananas. FML

#14616201
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26657) - you deserved it (3850) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my boyfriend moved. He moved from my room... to my housemate's room. FML

#14616202
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28825) - you deserved it (3129) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - love - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins



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