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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FMLs submitted from France

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

#15205288
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49293) - you deserved it (4172) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)

Today, I found out the hard way that if you think a waiter is hot, you probably shouldn't tell your parents. They could react by screaming at him across the room to tell him you think he's a hottie. FML

#15203097
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24486) - you deserved it (13782)

On 03/05/2011 at 12:34am - misc - by anonymous - France

Today, my mother noticed that I hadn't taken the trash out in a few weeks and angry, piled various full trash bags on my bed. I've been away on holiday for the past three weeks, I guess she didn't notice that part. FML

#15195848
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28050) - you deserved it (2904)

On 03/04/2011 at 11:25am - misc - by carr (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, thanks to a particularly spicy bowl of noodles, my nose decided it would rather be a fountain. A fountain of blood. FML

#15129596
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25123) - you deserved it (3399)

On 02/26/2011 at 5:59pm - health - by mwja (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML

#15114672
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32408) - you deserved it (5876)

On 02/25/2011 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by unwantedlove (woman) - France

Today, I woke up to a good friend of mine leaving my bed. The very friend I've had a crush on for months, and knows exactly how I feel about him. Everything was great until he said, "Yeah, about last night... It's just that you were there, and I was weak. See ya." FML

#14974628
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31243) - you deserved it (5334)

On 02/14/2011 at 3:25pm - love - by Emily (woman) - France (Auvergne)

Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML

#14955015
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40936) - you deserved it (5628)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:32am - intimacy - by Eva - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

#14921394
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9696) - you deserved it (31989)

On 02/10/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by Jaws (man) - France (Alsace)

Today, and even at this very moment, my ex, who I'm still in love with, is having sex with her new boyfriend. He's my neighbor and she's making a lot more noise with him than she did with me. FML

#14847899
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35065) - you deserved it (5023) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/05/2011 at 1:29am - intimacy - by homerde - Sent from mobile version

Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML

#14768786
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42545) - you deserved it (3852) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2011 at 1:21am - love - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46218) - you deserved it (3809) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25121) - you deserved it (6956) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a black eye by running into a door. To avoid being teased about her clumsiness, she's telling everyone that I beat her. FML

#14616204
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38024) - you deserved it (2979) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins



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