Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Cyprus

Today, I received a promotional message offering a half-off deal on an expensive coffee maker. The only reason why I received the message is because I bought that same coffee maker yesterday and I signed up to their mailing list. FML

#21417141
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24827) - you deserved it (2424)

On 05/28/2015 at 1:41pm - money - by FFS - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, I finally found my watch after weeks searching for it. It was on my teacher's wrist. FML

#21416691
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28487) - you deserved it (1770)

On 05/27/2015 at 3:40pm - misc - by concom - Cyprus

Today, a new employee started at our office. She's about 18, barely does any work, chews gum loudly, has no manners, and happens to sit right next to me. She also threatens to report me for harassment whenever I politely ask her to not bash my chair with the back of her chair. FML

#21413003
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28641) - you deserved it (1918)

On 05/20/2015 at 12:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Cyprus (Paphos)

Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. As things got heated, he broke down crying. I assumed it was just anxiety so I hugged him and told him it's alright and that it didn't matter, we'd try another time. Half an hour later, he confessed that he's actually gay. FML

Today, my taxi driver kept falling asleep and swerving off the road, so I asked him if he was okay. He stopped and burst out sobbing about the long hours he had to do after his divorce and his wife taking all he had. Long story short, I ended up driving him home and getting a taxi from his place. FML

#21273346
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39774) - you deserved it (3408)

On 10/08/2014 at 5:01am - misc - by rockytrolley - Cyprus

Today, I played a friendly prank on my dad, loosening the legs of his chair so it would fall apart when he sat on it. He responded by making me stand outside and watch as he keyed both sides of my car, front to back, as punishment. FML

#20944097
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35992) - you deserved it (41492)

On 11/03/2013 at 4:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, I attended my mother's funeral. My husband came too, and during the service, I kept hearing him giggling. I wrote it off as the usual awkward nerves, until he started snorting too, and I caught sight of the iPhone under his jacket. He was reading this very site. FML

#20725457
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60638) - you deserved it (4186)

On 06/14/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, my husband was arrested for having sex in public. FML

#20538233
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45594) - you deserved it (4456)

On 03/10/2013 at 2:50pm - love - by ifhehadadickforaheaditdbefuckingsmall (woman) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, I got so bored that I ordered my DVD drawer from awesomest to non-awesomest. I need a life. FML

#19368878
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15598) - you deserved it (5923)

On 03/29/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by melonhead77 - Cyprus

Today, after I sent around 300 entries to a competition hosted by a deodorant company where the main prize is a trip to Hawaii, spending around 5 hours sending the entries, I won a deodorant. FML

#18526839
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11579) - you deserved it (33718)

On 12/16/2011 at 9:59am - money - by mr.nobody (woman) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML

#16408581
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10412) - you deserved it (44377)

On 05/29/2011 at 9:45pm - work - by milkymoo (woman) - Cyprus

Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML

#14796617
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18779) - you deserved it (39189)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theshameofit (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, it's my first day-off for the holidays. Today is also the day they decided to start building a house next to mine. I can't sleep beyond 7 am. FML

#7007835
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22906) - you deserved it (1944)

On 12/29/2009 at 2:29am - misc - by dentinpalevo (man) - Cyprus (Limassol)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: