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FMLs submitted from Cyprus

Today, I found out my boyfriend has an account on a sex hookup site. He said it has "interesting articles" and that he'd completed his profile and listed his sexual preferences out of boredom. When I told him to sign in and prove he hadn't been messaging girls, he refused and called me paranoid. FML

#21477074
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28296) - you deserved it (2394)

On 10/07/2015 at 3:41am - love - by single once again (woman) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, I received a promotional message offering a half-off deal on an expensive coffee maker. The only reason why I received the message is because I bought that same coffee maker yesterday and I signed up to their mailing list. FML

#21417141
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26623) - you deserved it (2759)

On 05/28/2015 at 1:41pm - money - by FFS - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, I finally found my watch after weeks searching for it. It was on my teacher's wrist. FML

#21416691
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29948) - you deserved it (1976)

On 05/27/2015 at 3:40pm - misc - by concom - Cyprus

Today, a new employee started at our office. She's about 18, barely does any work, chews gum loudly, has no manners, and happens to sit right next to me. She also threatens to report me for harassment whenever I politely ask her to not bash my chair with the back of her chair. FML

#21413003
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30222) - you deserved it (2157)

On 05/20/2015 at 12:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Cyprus (Paphos)

Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. As things got heated, he broke down crying. I assumed it was just anxiety so I hugged him and told him it's alright and that it didn't matter, we'd try another time. Half an hour later, he confessed that he's actually gay. FML

Today, my taxi driver kept falling asleep and swerving off the road, so I asked him if he was okay. He stopped and burst out sobbing about the long hours he had to do after his divorce and his wife taking all he had. Long story short, I ended up driving him home and getting a taxi from his place. FML

#21273346
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41389) - you deserved it (3537)

On 10/08/2014 at 5:01am - misc - by rockytrolley - Cyprus

Today, I played a friendly prank on my dad, loosening the legs of his chair so it would fall apart when he sat on it. He responded by making me stand outside and watch as he keyed both sides of my car, front to back, as punishment. FML

#20944097
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37599) - you deserved it (43278)

On 11/03/2013 at 4:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, I attended my mother's funeral. My husband came too, and during the service, I kept hearing him giggling. I wrote it off as the usual awkward nerves, until he started snorting too, and I caught sight of the iPhone under his jacket. He was reading this very site. FML

#20725457
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62385) - you deserved it (4335)

On 06/14/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, my husband was arrested for having sex in public. FML

#20538233
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48815) - you deserved it (4720)

On 03/10/2013 at 2:50pm - love - by ifhehadadickforaheaditdbefuckingsmall (woman) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, I got so bored that I ordered my DVD drawer from awesomest to non-awesomest. I need a life. FML

#19368878
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18536) - you deserved it (6502)

On 03/29/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by melonhead77 - Cyprus

Today, after I sent around 300 entries to a competition hosted by a deodorant company where the main prize is a trip to Hawaii, spending around 5 hours sending the entries, I won a deodorant. FML

#18526839
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12557) - you deserved it (35374)

On 12/16/2011 at 9:59am - money - by mr.nobody (woman) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML

#16408581
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11818) - you deserved it (47586)

On 05/29/2011 at 9:45pm - work - by milkymoo (woman) - Cyprus

Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML

#14796617
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19812) - you deserved it (40836)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theshameofit (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)



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