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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, my boyfriend gave me a card for my birthday and told me to open it 10 minutes after he'd gone; I waited for 5. In the card was written, "It's not working out, but here's $20." FML

#48184
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60964) - you deserved it (3361)

On 02/15/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by blah (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was playing musical chairs at a family reunion. It's a well known fact that I'm competitive and tend to hip check people to get that last chair. It came down to me and The Nana. I won. The Nana has a broken hip. FML

#46151
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7396) - you deserved it (64483)

On 02/15/2009 at 10:29am - misc - by nana. (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl. FML

#45902
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37591) - you deserved it (2590)

On 02/15/2009 at 5:32am - misc - by lamesauce (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my two best friends decided to boycott Valentine's Day, ditching their boyfriends to hang out together. Not only am I single, but I wasn't invited. FML

#43145
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35336) - you deserved it (2183)

On 02/14/2009 at 6:14pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend of one month and I had an amazing night of dinner and dancing, but when I leaned in to kiss her, she said, "You're joking right?" FML

#41639
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39469) - you deserved it (3543)

On 02/14/2009 at 12:35pm - misc - by semi-depressed (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found my daughter on Facebook after years of looking for her after the divorce. It turns out it was my ex pretending to be my daughter so she could track me down. FML

#27666
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46563) - you deserved it (5553)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:06pm - misc - by toad (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I took my dog to the vet and she was diagnosed with obesity. The vet then told me that dogs usually imitate their owners eating and behavior habits. FML

#26407
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17175) - you deserved it (22531)

On 02/11/2009 at 5:05pm - animals - by qwertyasdfghzxcv - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

#24664
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34247) - you deserved it (7493)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:45am - misc - by Chicketi (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friend was picking on me at school by constantly tapping on my shoulder. At recess I had enough. I felt the familiar tap on my shoulder, and I drove my elbow into what I thought was my friends stomach. It was my Principal. FML

#24455
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23467) - you deserved it (15398)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:38am - misc - by da man (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I told my mom I loved her a lot. Her reply? "Thanks." FML

#14836
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24948) - you deserved it (3662)

On 02/08/2009 at 11:30am - misc - by KaLa (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was watching 24 and realized that Jack Bauer had gotten more action in 5 hours than I had in 5 months. FML

#14536
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26448) - you deserved it (6178)

On 02/08/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling in bed. After looking at me for a while he said, "you look better when I'm not wearing my contacts". FML

#14320
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34008) - you deserved it (2170)

On 02/08/2009 at 12:21am - misc - by klee (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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