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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, I went on the best date I've been on in years. Later on, over drinks we get talking and I explain how I came out to my friends and family. When I ask him how he came out, he replies that he isn't gay, and oh, did I think this was a date? FML

#141984
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55764) - you deserved it (11325)

On 02/26/2009 at 9:56am - love - by thetheatreguy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked downstairs in a new outfit, after dieting for 3 months, and losing just over 20 pounds. My mom took one look at me and said "You'd better keep going." FML

#134892
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44598) - you deserved it (3072)

On 02/25/2009 at 5:06pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I forgot my work clothes at home so my boss gave me a jacket with a name patch that said "Mike". Still wearing my work clothes I ran into my ex-girlfriend on my way home. We were together for five years until she dumped me for a guy name Mike. FML

#131140
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38796) - you deserved it (3795)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:42am - love - by laf@me (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I stayed home, sick in bed. I had been sleeping on my arms. I got up quickly to grab the phone. My numb left arm rocketed and punched me in the (now cut) lip, which threw me off balance, making me smash my (now bloody) nose off of the headboard. It was a telemarketer. FML

#123831
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48698) - you deserved it (5470)

On 02/24/2009 at 3:34pm - health - by Sick (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I drove into my school. Literally drove into my school. FML

#121869
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19875) - you deserved it (49132)

On 02/24/2009 at 8:43am - misc - by shilpajayseanfan (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to brush up on my flirting skills and ask a guy I thought was kind of cute what time it was. He pointed to the very visible watch on my wrist and said "You should know already". FML

#120192
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7168) - you deserved it (49917)

On 02/24/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Timeless (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my mum came home from a business trip. My four-year-old brother, who I'd been watching, told her I was "sexing" my boyfriend a lot after I put him to bed. After lots of arguing, she banned me from seeing him and took my car away. Only much later did I realize my brother meant "texting". FML

#113033
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77387) - you deserved it (4742)

On 02/23/2009 at 11:47am - intimacy - by Megan (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was working my shift and my ex girlfriend came in to apply for a job. She broke up with me for another guy so i can't stand being in the same room as her. The manager talked to her and decided to hire her on the spot. I need to train her. FML

#112173
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54586) - you deserved it (2767)

On 02/23/2009 at 5:35am - misc - by jeezy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was happy because my exact shirt and sweater were in seventeen magazine. They were in the "what not to wear" category. FML

#101622
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33322) - you deserved it (12184)

On 02/22/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by secenteenmagazine. - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML

#97632
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (260341) - you deserved it (58834)

On 02/21/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by GD (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, a girl I really liked mentioned she's home alone and that she was really really lonely. She offered for me to come over and watch a few movies with her, and as I got prepared to leave she sent me a text saying " can you pick up my friend Spencer? " FML

#92040
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42699) - you deserved it (2861)

On 02/20/2009 at 9:42pm - love - by batman123 (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked home from work when a woman asked me to come inside for a free meal. It was at a homeless shelter. FML

#80868
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34298) - you deserved it (4625)

On 02/19/2009 at 6:42pm - misc - by Kev (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at Church, the little boy sitting behind me asked his mother if I had the chicken pox, because there were red dots all over my face. I've had bad acne since I was twelve. FML

#69964
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44150) - you deserved it (3426)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:09pm - kids - by Spotted (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)



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