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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, at work while washing the dishes I was told to go put some things into the big freezer at the back of the store. While doing so, the door closed behind me, so naturally I pushed it, only to have my wet hands freeze to the door. I yelled to my manager for 10 minutes before help came. FML

#4650145
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38801) - you deserved it (5112)

On 08/19/2009 at 4:44am - work - by ohno. (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML

#4624191
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43476) - you deserved it (15566)

On 08/18/2009 at 8:35am - misc - by peepeepants (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my aunt to pluck my eyebrows since hers are perfectly done. What I didn't know is she gets hers professionally shaped and she doesn't know how to shape eyebrows. I now look like a surprised Vulcan. FML

#4606857
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36040) - you deserved it (20390)

On 08/17/2009 at 6:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boss called me into his office. He then fired me. Upset, I asked him "Well, who's gonna replace me?" His answer was "I don't know and don't care. Everyone who works here hates you. Now go away." FML

#4605529
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40239) - you deserved it (22765)

On 08/17/2009 at 5:16pm - work - by vmml97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ran into a guy that I had gone on a few dates with 3 months ago and slept with him a few times, but then never heard from him again. When he looked at me, I went over and gave him a hug and said "Hey, how are you, Chris?". He hugged me back and said "Hey there cutie, what's your name?". FML

#4603777
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42099) - you deserved it (16433)

On 08/17/2009 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. We went inside the theatre and he saw a couple of his friends. Instead of saying hi and coming back to watch the movie with me, he ditched me for them. When I reminded him he was forgetting something, he grabbed the popcorn out of my hands and left. FML

#4603530
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52539) - you deserved it (5473)

On 08/17/2009 at 3:49pm - love - by ditched (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went through my 15 year old daughter's internet history. On google she searched 'Excuses to get away from your dad' and 5 other variations of the same thing. We were supposed to be having a father daughter day tomorrow. FML

#4576081
387 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47710) - you deserved it (15632)

On 08/16/2009 at 4:04pm - misc - by alealovespurple - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter for this girl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admirer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxious to finish the letter that I ended up writing my name at the bottom. FML

#4563913
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10568) - you deserved it (48495)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:17am - love - by footyfallout (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I'm having my housewarming party and had prepared food, drink and games for all the 19 confirmed guests on Facebook. I waited till 11 but nobody showed up. I checked Facebook again and realized I had accidentally put tomorrow as the party date. I have to work the whole day tomorrow. FML

#4562871
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10880) - you deserved it (46490)

On 08/16/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by revalc (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was working at the theater as an Usher. A man comes up to me and gives me his ticket. At the same time, he takes a sip of water and suddenly felt the need to sneeze. The water came out from his nose and landed all over my face. I was covered with his mucus and had to wish him a good movie. FML

#4562755
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37294) - you deserved it (2251)

On 08/16/2009 at 12:31am - misc - by Tiff676 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML

#4548386
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42975) - you deserved it (2818)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:58pm - misc - by iltdtsm - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I decided to be safe and tested a small dime-sized amount of Nair on my inner arm before using it. I didn't react badly. But as soon as it was washed off from my down-there hair I sure as hell reacted, with small bumpy red dots that look like an STD. FML

#4540987
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33278) - you deserved it (12389)

On 08/15/2009 at 1:22am - health - by Dammit (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML

#4539697
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (124427) - you deserved it (6496)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by jellybean_94 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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