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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, while teaching swim lessons, a boy was holding a noodle and claimed it was his fishing rod. Trying to be fun, I grabbed on and told him to "reel" me in. He then yells out 'YAY, I caught a whale!'. FML

Today, my 15-year-old daughter asked for a ride to her boyfriend's house. It's the same house I've been driving her to for sleepovers with her friend "Kate" for two years. FML

#4473849
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32822) - you deserved it (46037)

On 08/12/2009 at 12:14pm - kids - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my mom about how my friend is going to China for a year instead of college. My mom suggested that I could do the same. When I told her that a trip to China is probably more expensive than my college tuition, my mom replied, "Not for a one way ticket". FML

#4454040
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34045) - you deserved it (4763)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by unwanted - Canada

Today, my mom said that we needed to have a family meeting because of all the issues that have been going on with our family. My mom, sister and I sat down and began to talk about everything. As I started to cry my sister looks at my mom and says "I win!". She bet my mom $20 that I would cry. FML

#4445611
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35582) - you deserved it (6650)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:43am - misc - by amie (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was talking with my friend-turned boyfriend and cutely told him that I could no longer remember all the things that he used to do that bothered me. He told me he could remember every one of mine and listed them all off for me. FML

#4441693
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16108) - you deserved it (35858)

On 08/11/2009 at 1:01am - love - by thanksjerk (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I polished off the delicious iced gingerbread cookies in the pantry. I'd assumed the little flecks on them were speckles of broken icing, but as I went to throw the cookie bag away, a larva crawled out. The hundreds of flecks were moth eggs. I've been eating the cookies for three days. FML

#4418017
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43875) - you deserved it (18188)

On 08/10/2009 at 12:25am - animals - by Entheatus (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out the hot girl I'd been flirting with on Facebook is actually 3 10-year-olds who created a fake profile to see how many desperate losers would try to hook up with her. FML

#4412595
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10656) - you deserved it (60476)

On 08/09/2009 at 7:54pm - misc - by pwndbykidz (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I saw my girlfriend with an older guy who I thought was her dad, I went over to introduce myself. And then turned around and walked away very fast as I saw them make out. My girlfriend is cheating on me with someone as old as my dad. FML

#4412147
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45262) - you deserved it (2289)

On 08/09/2009 at 7:11pm - love - by roobb (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I gathered both mine and my girlfriend's families secretly to a restaurant. I paid the restaurant to play romantic music, and paid for the best table available. As soon as we finished our meal, our families gathered around and I proposed. She laughed and said no way. FML

#4405336
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84263) - you deserved it (6090)

On 08/09/2009 at 9:48am - love - by gtrs750 (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I worked at my job at an amusement park at one of the roller coasters. I have to go around and make sure that every seat belt is around the passenger. I saw my boyfriend in a seat and ran over to say hi. I saw a girl next to him. I had to strap down my cheating boyfriend and the new girl. FML

#4405208
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57324) - you deserved it (3182)

On 08/09/2009 at 9:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw my girlfriend going into my best friend's dorm room and suspected her to cheat on me so I placed a camera in his room to spy on them. In the end, I discovered that my girlfriend has problems in math and both my best friend and brother are gay. FML

#4379475
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14969) - you deserved it (69916)

On 08/08/2009 at 3:18am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I decided to surprise my husband by bringing home a case of beer and renting us a porno. He decided to surprise me by telling me he was leaving me for his pregnant girlfriend. FML

#4368729
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49430) - you deserved it (3527)

On 08/07/2009 at 7:35pm - misc - by Screwed (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a video call with a couple of old friends, but the conversation sort of got boring, so I started mouthing words so they'd think the connection was bad and end the awkwardness. Then, as soon as they hung up the call, I realized I'd left my music on in the background the whole time. FML

#4348564
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4562) - you deserved it (61020)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:10pm - misc - by fazzems (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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