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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, I finished my position paper for my social studies class and read it to my mom to get her opinion on it. After I'm done reading it, she asks me if I copied it from somewhere because it sounded very professional and smart, and it didn't sound like me. FML

#7313469
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24100) - you deserved it (3022)

On 01/13/2010 at 1:08am - misc - by SMRT (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked in on my parents necking in the living room. I promptly covered my eyes and muttered something about my innocence being stolen from me. My dad looked up from the couch, and mentioned that he had heard my innocence being stolen by Jake, my boyfriend from 2 years ago. FML

#7287898
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8487) - you deserved it (35958)

On 01/11/2010 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I thought I'd wear my snow boots so I wouldn't slip on the ice at work. I crashed my car because I can't feel the pedals with my boots on. FML

#7278086
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8192) - you deserved it (27660)

On 01/11/2010 at 12:53pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I sneezed with so much force while I was driving that I whacked my head on the steering wheel and honked the horn. FML

#7268268
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23853) - you deserved it (4065)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm - misc - by Hayley (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I propositioned my boyfriend of two years to have sex with me in the shower to spice up our love life. He said that he was really busy. He was playing Call of Duty. FML

#7255890
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18780) - you deserved it (5293)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was wondering why my home smelled so weird, until I found out that my 4 year old son had been secretly scattering around food he didn't like to eat throughout the house. How did I find out? No one else in this family leaves half eaten spinach all over my underwear drawer. FML

#7254333
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24508) - you deserved it (3525)

On 01/10/2010 at 5:45am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I saw a picture of me from a night of drinking that surprisingly looked really really good. I showed my boyfriend and he agreed with me. Then he added, "What's funny is it looks nothing like you!" FML

#7215192
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22744) - you deserved it (3456)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I logged onto Facebook with a new notification. I got excited, until I went on to see that it was my mom commenting on my status. She had seen my friends swear in previous comments and decided to make a comment of her own. She told them, "Hey, watch out yr language!" I'm nineteen. FML

#7211285
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21727) - you deserved it (5584)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by iamshrimpy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got my car back from the repair shop. After paying $400 for them to fix the scratches on the driver's side door, some one decided to key both sides of my car while I was on my lunch break from work. FML

#7199217
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26797) - you deserved it (2521)

On 01/07/2010 at 1:42pm - money - by Animal_aide (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a haircut, and after thanking the stylist I went up front to pay. The lady behind the counter took one look at me, smiled and said "well, now you'll need a hat." FML

#7196833
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24757) - you deserved it (2323)

On 01/07/2010 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I entered my bedroom, ready to play some COD on my xbox 360. Instead, I find a note where my xbox used to be. It read "You think you can cheat on me and get away with it? Fuck you. I smashed the hell out of your stupid xbox." It was signed by my girlfriend. I never cheated on her. FML

#7185908
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35826) - you deserved it (2977)

On 01/06/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I walked to the end of my driveway to pick up the newspaper. I read the front page that was talking about people who have been getting hurt from slipping on ice. Laughing about that thought and walking up my driveway, I slip. FML

#7135383
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6450) - you deserved it (31262)

On 01/03/2010 at 10:50pm - health - by fml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I just spent half an hour cleaning up my little brother's puke after he got drunk for the first time. All the people who bought him drinks are still out partying and having a good time, while all I can smell is whiskey, Chinese food, and whatever else was in his stomach. FML

#7120225
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24572) - you deserved it (2864)

On 01/03/2010 at 3:42am - misc - by always-the-responsible-one (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)



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