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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, my boyfriend came over while I was babysitting my little brother. He wouldn't stay in bed, so my boyfriend told him,"If you don't stay in bed, the monster will eat you!" I now have to wash my brother's bedsheets, because he was too afraid to get up and go pee. FML

#12108536
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29992) - you deserved it (10388)

On 07/25/2010 at 7:21pm - kids - by animelover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I managed to multitask too much at work. I turned around, adjusted my glasses, swept hair out of my face, and blinked. In the process I walked into my manager, causing me to simultaneously punch myself in the mouth. FML

#12097441
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23015) - you deserved it (6540)

On 07/25/2010 at 2:13am - work - by longday (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. How? I went to a party with some friends and they each bet me $20 I couldn't lick my elbow. I guess I proved them wrong. FML

#12095964
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9640) - you deserved it (40520)

On 07/25/2010 at 1:06am - health - by one_BAMF - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I spent 100 dollars on lingerie. I put it on, walk out to the living room, and tell my boyfriend to follow me into the bedroom. He says no, and then pretends to fall asleep. FML

#12090556
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35012) - you deserved it (6224)

On 07/24/2010 at 7:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous90 (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I found out how much it hurts to be shot with a paintball in your open mouth. My mouth was only open to say I was hit. FML

#12072819
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33374) - you deserved it (7347)

On 07/23/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by owowowow - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to the mall. While shopping in a store, a woman bumped into me numerous times. Getting annoyed, I turned to her and loudly exclaimed, "Are you blind?!" Turns out she was. FML

#12070882
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11701) - you deserved it (46276)

On 07/23/2010 at 7:47pm - misc - by Not So Smart (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my father made his bellybutton talk. In front of my new boyfriend. FML

#12049676
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34124) - you deserved it (4288)

On 07/22/2010 at 7:14pm - love - by coffee_princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML

#12027756
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51060) - you deserved it (6037)

On 07/21/2010 at 4:31pm - love - by highlandgirl10 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got a call from my grandmother saying she locked her keys in the car and I needed to bring her the spares. After an hour bus ride, involving me missing my stop and getting temporarily lost, I arrived and handed her the keys. I brought the wrong ones. FML

#12023647
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16558) - you deserved it (30061)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Syrinth (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

#11944390
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16672) - you deserved it (59060)

On 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm - intimacy - by reckless (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out my mother had remarried, and that I was getting a stepfather and stepbrother. However I found out about it 30 minutes before we left to pick them up from the airport, and also found out that I'm losing my bedroom. FML

#11895645
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42613) - you deserved it (2891)

On 07/15/2010 at 6:52am - misc - by photonut13 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I slipped on the wet floor at work and sprained my wrist badly. I was carrying the wet floor sign so no one would slip. FML

#11852475
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34845) - you deserved it (6912)

On 07/13/2010 at 2:28pm - work - by babygirllxo - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my parents told me that I was born to entertain my brother. I have found the meaning of life. FML

#11718705
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40919) - you deserved it (3961)

On 07/07/2010 at 5:43am - misc - by 42 (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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