Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, I won 10,555 dollars on scratch cards! My sister got me to do a happy dance and filmed it. The video is on facebook and the tickets were fake. FML

#5793499
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31135) - you deserved it (7013)

On 10/12/2009 at 9:21am - money - by Dora (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son lost his pet rat, Charlie. Whilst vacuuming under my couch, the vacuum suddenly shut off. Something was stuck in it, so I took it apart. Something was inside, so I leaned in closer to get a better look. Bad news? I need a new vacuum. Good news? I found Charlie. FML

#5789871
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27945) - you deserved it (3995)

On 10/12/2009 at 1:27am - misc - by ohgosh (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend called me and told me he wanted me to stay the night. I decided to wear my sexiest outfit for him so I put on my kinky nurse outfit and drove over to his house. I let myself in his front door, to which I found 40 of my closest friends staring at me for my surprise birthday party. FML

#5762164
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32870) - you deserved it (18821)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by perfectmoment - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother, who religiously checks her bank account after every purchase, then shreds her receipts, got fed up with me not doing the same. So she shredded all my piled up receipts. These include the 100s of dollars I had spent for my work, which I need the receipts to get reimbursed for. FML

#5745365
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38525) - you deserved it (2812)

On 10/09/2009 at 7:22pm - money - by poorman (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was helping my elderly landlady (75 years old) carry in her groceries. She said "Thanks" and then handed me a notice of eviction. FML

#5715607
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31434) - you deserved it (4637)

On 10/08/2009 at 12:24am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

#5701860
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (162005) - you deserved it (8155)

On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML

#5690935
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35113) - you deserved it (6126)

On 10/06/2009 at 9:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home from work to my basement flooding. With sewage. That wasn't from our house. FML

#5656248
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33996) - you deserved it (1665)

On 10/05/2009 at 1:28am - misc - by razzipost1 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall with a note saying "Sorry Dude". FML

#5655970
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11472) - you deserved it (37679)

On 10/05/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I did a 3 hour long assignment for school. I was bored so I gave it the title "F***ing Assignment for a F***ing Teacher." I went downstairs only to discover that the printer was out of ink. So I sent it to her email, then I realized that I didn't change the title. FML

#5651382
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7955) - you deserved it (51978)

On 10/04/2009 at 9:47pm - work - by BadStuden (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend's head was on my lap. I bent down to kiss him. My stomach rolls got there first. FML

#5645915
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19157) - you deserved it (44408)

On 10/04/2009 at 5:40pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after weeks of therapy for severe depression, my therapist thought it would be helpful to confess my deepest problems to my friends, to prove that it was alright to trust people. I did. They laughed. Hard. FML

#5637685
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39272) - you deserved it (3481)

On 10/04/2009 at 5:42am - misc - by backtosquareone (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my computer stopped working. Me, the technology challenged one, decided to do a system recovery on it hoping that I could make it better. Turns out, system recovery means deleting all the files off the computer including family photos, music and assignments and starting fresh. FML

#5636534
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10212) - you deserved it (48529)

On 10/04/2009 at 3:03am - misc - by rebeccaremily - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: