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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, my now ex-boyfriend accused me of wanting to screw his 11-year-old brother, all because I expressed interest in going to his birthday party. FML

#21523204
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5282) - you deserved it (355)

On 02/05/2016 at 9:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while I was taking a shit, a guy went into the next stall and narrated what he was doing in song. I'm still traumatized by his lyrics. FML

#21522585
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17663) - you deserved it (1377)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:13pm - misc - by Lord_Nick (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I tried to explain autism to my classmates. One of them, a professional cunt who's always looking for an excuse to lecture people, accused me of being "ableist" because my explanations weren't accurate, and said I shouldn't explain things I don't understand. I'm actually autistic. FML

#21522371
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20362) - you deserved it (1296)

On 02/03/2016 at 8:33am - health - by Ishikur (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was at the gym. I'm 360 lbs and have finally decided it's time to change that. Some girl and her two bitch friends thought it'd be fun to follow me and belittle me at everything I did. When I mentioned it to the staff, they said that they were just "encouraging" me. FML

#21522018
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25535) - you deserved it (1668)

On 02/02/2016 at 5:17am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML

#21521652
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18430) - you deserved it (1244)

On 02/01/2016 at 1:07am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I rushed over to stop my infant daughter from falling off her swing. Luckily just before she hit the ground, I woke up. Unfortunately, I woke up because I'd rolled off my bed and hit the floor. FML

#21521050
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17701) - you deserved it (1531)

On 01/30/2016 at 3:56am - kids - by MandieL - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out my parents only had me in an attempt to fix their relationship. It didn't work. FML

#21520383
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20801) - you deserved it (1205)

On 01/28/2016 at 11:05am - misc - by crinitis - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I received a phone call from my boss, from the other side of the country. It seems the conference I sent him to is actually happening next week. FML

#21520233
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18254) - you deserved it (6225)

On 01/27/2016 at 9:44pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my neighbors in the apartment above me yet again had a loud fight, well past midnight while I was trying to sleep. I stood on my bed and pounded on the ceiling to shut them up. And now I'll have to explain the two fist-shaped holes in the ceiling to my landlord. FML

#21518447
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18121) - you deserved it (7386)

On 01/23/2016 at 2:49am - intimacy - by soon to have a fist shaped hole in my ass (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that the pain I've had for the past couple of weeks was actually due to a broken collar bone. Now work won't pay for the treatment I need because I continued to work despite the pain. FML

#21518327
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (1998)

On 01/22/2016 at 8:43pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my 17 year old told me he wanted to pursue a career in art. Knowing he's extremely talented at drawing, I congratulated him and told him to pursue that dream. A few hours later I learn that he's been arrested for spray painting graffiti dicks all over a school wall. Well, he's famous now. FML

#21517961
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21496) - you deserved it (2023)

On 01/21/2016 at 9:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while I was working replacing a windshield, some jerk off hit my truck. A truck carrying 2 grand in glass. Including the windshield I was about to install. The driver gets out and says, "Sorry man, I had to text my girlfriend." FML

#21517790
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22174) - you deserved it (1058)

On 01/21/2016 at 1:09pm - work - by automotive glass tech - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was starting to get freaky with my boyfriend when his dad came in with no warning to let the dog into my boyfriend's bedroom. His dad noticed what was going on and covered the dog's eyes instead of just leaving. FML

#21517614
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20488) - you deserved it (3222)

On 01/20/2016 at 11:41pm - intimacy - by Garfield - Canada (Ontario)



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