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FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, I found a wallet belonging to some guy, it had $355 inside. Because he had his address written inside, I decided to return it hoping for a reward. I drove for 40 mins and finally got to his house during peak hour. All he did was say "oh cool". FML

#7693215
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27928) - you deserved it (12816)

On 01/30/2010 at 12:06am - money - by Sheggie (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mum got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML

#7608108
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35489) - you deserved it (3007)

On 01/27/2010 at 5:20am - misc - by Sundendako (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke up with a cordless drill on my bed. The one I lent my neighbour last week. FML

#7606861
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26292) - you deserved it (2178)

On 01/27/2010 at 2:41am - misc - by Brummsta (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I learned that removing your boyfriends boxers with your teeth is waaaay less sexy when you accidentally bite a chunk of his pubes and yank them out in the process. FML

#7585326
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7805) - you deserved it (22557)

On 01/26/2010 at 3:59am - intimacy - by sexyfail (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

#7564644
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27985) - you deserved it (2904)

On 01/25/2010 at 5:18am - kids - by shitface (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML

#7538814
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24364) - you deserved it (6573)

On 01/24/2010 at 3:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML

#7518745
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21511) - you deserved it (2907)

On 01/23/2010 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I planned my own wedding down to the very last detail, including favours for my guests, the sweets buffet and the bouquet of flower brooches I want. Too bad I'm still single. FML

#7516892
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9229) - you deserved it (32768)

On 01/23/2010 at 5:27am - love - by SINGLE (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were eating an icecream, he put his arm around me and began leaning in for what I thought was a kiss. Instead, he grabbed and began jiggling my stomach fat, along with making raspberry sounds. Once he was done, he did the same to my thighs. FML

#7516271
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28172) - you deserved it (7138)

On 01/23/2010 at 3:38am - love - by weirdlove (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend and I went for a swim in his pool. I was hoping that the swim would be somewhat romantic, however, that came to an abrupt end when he decided that it would be cool and funny to try and lift me up by my boobs. FML

#7454643
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29011) - you deserved it (3898)

On 01/20/2010 at 11:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a little "fun" in our secluded backyard. It was only after we had finished that we noticed the three little girls, who live next door, jumping up and down on their trampoline, with their mouths wide open. FML

Today, whilst at work, my dad decided to call me and sing an entire rendition of 'The Gambler' by Kenny Rogers. There was a big line of people, and my boss had been standing nearby checking out my phone. I had to stand there and listen to the whole song. FML

#7452564
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16894) - you deserved it (4145)

On 01/20/2010 at 5:01am - misc - by embarrassedinretail (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got a letter in the mail, my mother has applied for a reduction in her child support payments for my brother and I. She's paid $10 child support in 16 years. FML

#7416712
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29315) - you deserved it (1799)

On 01/18/2010 at 9:23am - money - by bluewatersify - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)



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