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FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, I bought a new Siamese Fighting Fish. I was so happy with my new fish so I bought him an expensive lovely bowl, some weeds, and a toy for the bowl. I left the room to get the fish food. When I returned, the fish was gone, and the cat was sitting on the table. FML

#7156586
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16447) - you deserved it (6120)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:15am - animals - by bels12 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 4 year old daughter was ripping out photos of the family photo book, I asked her why she was doing it she answered, "I saw mummy doing it to another book." The only other family photo book was the day we got married. FML

#7140982
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19935) - you deserved it (2115)

On 01/04/2010 at 3:50am - misc - by Michael (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

#7139059
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21488) - you deserved it (5194)

On 01/04/2010 at 1:43am - health - by sadface (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

 Today, while I was trying to get to sleep, I heard a strange noise coming from the bunk bed above mine. I looked up to see what it was and my cat vomited over the edge, onto my face. FML

#7078768
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21223) - you deserved it (2160)

On 01/01/2010 at 8:03am - animals - by grosssss (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my stepdad did a crap in the shape of the number 2, took a picture of it and showed it to all my friends at my party, while we were eating. FML

#7077814
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25324) - you deserved it (2821)

On 01/01/2010 at 6:12am - misc - by Moosh - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after buying over $300 worth of food and alcohol, I found out all my friends aren't coming to my New Years party but headed to the BIG party at the local club. The one which I sold my ticket to after my friends convinced me to throw a party instead. FML

#7041342
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26610) - you deserved it (2304)

On 12/30/2009 at 7:28pm - misc - by 20 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I backed out of the driveway of our newly built home. Being unfamiliar with the driveway, I ended up getting bogged in the mud and slid halfway down the steep slope of the front yard, trying free myself. I haven't met my neighbours yet. They stood in their front lawns watching me. FML

#6967912
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15792) - you deserved it (3297)

On 12/27/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by jaded_woman (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got a new laptop for Christmas. The picture on the box showed a woman balancing it on one finger to show how light it was, so I tried it myself. I dropped my laptop, breaking the hard drive and putting a massive crack down the screen. FML

#6953909
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5454) - you deserved it (83668)

On 12/26/2009 at 7:43am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML

#6953786
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21180) - you deserved it (8794)

On 12/26/2009 at 7:06am - misc - by creepyguy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had two surprises for my boyfriend who was at work. One was a dessert and the other was sexy lingerie. He chose the dessert. Then told me I was an idiot. FML

#6951563
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12725) - you deserved it (3228)

On 12/26/2009 at 2:22am - intimacy - by boyfriendisatoss (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I sat for 3 hours at my boyfriend's Christmas celebrations. He has 22 cousins. They open presents one at a time. In silence. I got nothing. FML

#6933166
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25345) - you deserved it (2532)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:28am - love - by Earths_Venus (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went home, where I live alone, from my dorm room at my university. The only Christmas cards I had received were addressed to the person that lived there before me. FML

#6916745
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19560) - you deserved it (1784)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:18am - misc - by LonelySanta (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while eating a sandwich, I saw a worm. Knowing that my friend always tries to scare me with fake worms and insects, I bit it to show her I knew it was fake. It was real. FML

#6893264
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8659) - you deserved it (27467)

On 12/22/2009 at 10:52pm - animals - by iHateWorms (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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