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FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, I had a weird dream I woke up on the bathroom floor at my local gym. Turns out it wasn't a dream, and I passed out from "overworking myself". I was on the treadmill for under 5 minutes, walking. FML

#10834271
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23943) - you deserved it (13025)

On 05/29/2010 at 1:28am - misc - by crashingdown - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I tested the new taps in the shower, with my head. Yep, they're strong enough. FML

#10817967
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8270) - you deserved it (22009)

On 05/28/2010 at 9:18am - misc - by gahdamnit - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited. I had just finished planning a surprise party for her. FML

#10796974
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38989) - you deserved it (2877)

On 05/27/2010 at 10:06am - misc - by reginaphalange - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I have both a cold and a period. Tomorrow, I will have a cold, my period and my wisdom teeth taken out. FML

#10719065
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45602) - you deserved it (3321)

On 05/23/2010 at 8:22pm - misc - by Unlucky (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

#10707989
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17473) - you deserved it (25838)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I hadn't been out in two weeks, and I was looking forward to going to the beach with my friends. Instead, I rear-ended someone at a roundabout and had to go home. FML

#10664484
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8903) - you deserved it (19607)

On 05/21/2010 at 6:11am - misc - by CARnage (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my sister decided to wake me up by pumping handwash into my open mouth. FML

#10540841
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28540) - you deserved it (3070)

On 05/15/2010 at 2:27am - misc - by sheridan.ashley (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to do something fun and spontaneous, so we had sex in the disabled toilet in the shopping centre. Little did we know, the male AND female toilets were conveniently being cleaned at the time, so the only toilet open was the disabled one. Walk of shame. FML

#10279492
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9215) - you deserved it (41116)

On 05/01/2010 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by sam (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend wouldn't lick the whipped cream I had on my nipples because "That stuff is full of calories." FML

#10158363
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39207) - you deserved it (8722)

On 04/26/2010 at 5:58am - intimacy - by Rowden (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was expecting a call from my friend. The phone rang and I answered with "WANK!!" as a joke. It wasn't my friend on the phone, it was my boss. FML

#10132808
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8619) - you deserved it (38731)

On 04/25/2010 at 6:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was pulled over by a cop and was fined $210 for making an illegal u-turn. When the cop finished writing my ticket and hopped in his car, he made the same u-turn. FML

#9770202
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42588) - you deserved it (6712)

On 04/10/2010 at 1:00am - money - by lance - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got dumped because I was on my period. Apparently he was pissed because I have one "like, every single month." FML

Today, I had to explain to my dad why it is important for him to clear the browsing history after watching sexual explicit material on the family computer. FML

#9238749
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27308) - you deserved it (3618)

On 03/20/2010 at 4:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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