Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Australia

Today, I found my "lost" bicycle in my best friend's garage. I've been having to catch two buses to get to work for the past few months. FML

#18029940
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23852) - you deserved it (2568)

On 10/20/2011 at 7:51am - misc - by jwhizzle - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my parents had a fight as to which one of them is the most cultured. As a result, they've begun writing my chore lists in a variety of languages. If I don't do them, I'm grounded. I only speak English. FML

#18025150
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24832) - you deserved it (2892)

On 10/19/2011 at 6:29pm - misc - by Missy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my best friend who I have known for ten years recommended I didn't continue a relationship with my girlfriend. I thought she wanted to go out with me which I was hoping for, for a long time. Turns out she wanted to go out with her. FML

#18022095
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35258) - you deserved it (6114)

On 10/19/2011 at 8:19am - love - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML

#18021693
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28841) - you deserved it (3042)

On 10/19/2011 at 5:40am - misc - by targe - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it's my sister's birthday. My parents got her a cat. I have serious allergies when it comes to cats. When I brought this issue up with my parents, they replied, "This day is not about you, it's about your sister." I can feel my throat tightening already. FML

#18005415
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34760) - you deserved it (2901)

On 10/17/2011 at 7:46am - health - by Cats...FML (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML

#18001464
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7218) - you deserved it (52608)

On 10/16/2011 at 8:47pm - health - by kp - Australia

Today, I left my window open while practicing the saxophone. My drunk neighbours showed their appreciation for the music with a well-aimed firecracker that set my mattress on fire. My landlord has threatened to evict me as she thinks I set it off. FML

#17965886
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24961) - you deserved it (5101)

On 10/12/2011 at 4:13am - misc - by ItaliczZz (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was threatened with suspension from school because of my nose piercing. I had to explain that it's actually a pimple. FML

#17960494
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35057) - you deserved it (2511)

On 10/11/2011 at 4:05pm - health - by top dog! - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came home from work to find the front door wide open, the stove on, my 5 year old cutting up the curtain, and my 2 year old smearing chocolate sauce on the floor. My fiancé was nowhere to be found. Later on, I got a text from him saying that he'd gone to watch the footy. FML

Today, I let a guy I like look at my phone. A second later I remembered I had a secret copy of his Facebook profile picture on there to show a friend what he looked like. I was forced to tackle him to get my phone back. FML

#17940122
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11340) - you deserved it (36227)

On 10/09/2011 at 1:17am - love - by Emily S - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML

#17938205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12288) - you deserved it (23819)

On 10/08/2011 at 9:20pm - health - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was walking down the street on my way to work, when an old lady's walking stick caught my leg and sent me crashing to the ground. She apologised for the accident and watched me stumble to my feet. I said not to worry. Just as I turned to leave, I could swear a smirk crept over her face. FML

#17930849
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24154) - you deserved it (2980)

On 10/07/2011 at 9:23pm - work - by Lucas79 - Australia

Today, my Dad's banjo arrived, as part of his mid-life crisis. It would be fine if he could play it but unfortunately he's tone deaf. He hasn't stopped playing it for the last 4 hours. FML

#17927244
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22823) - you deserved it (2270)

On 10/07/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)



FML's blog

  • Sidonie's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! In this week's edition, some pedalos, some kittens, a bunch of gypsy singers, some ponytails, a crooner, a house that looks like Hitler, a joke about George W. Bush's cocaine habit and a brilliant…

Thursday 19 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: