Today, my mum got a new blender. Dinner was roast beef, broccoli, cauliflower, pumpkin, potatoes and water. In a cup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29524) - you deserved it (2050)
On 01/31/2013 at 5:28am - health - by I'maboutobarf - Australia
Today, I spent most of my daughter's 8th birthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was put in a cast. Apparently, my son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on their 8th birthday before encouraging her to find out by jumping off the slippery slide. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17619) - you deserved it (1294)
On 01/30/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I got my retainer fitted. It stimulates my gag reflex so badly that I gag every time I try so say anything with a 'P' in it. My orthodontist laughed and suggested I get a thesaurus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22703) - you deserved it (1487)
On 01/30/2013 at 2:52am - health - by Miss Blairgowrie (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my mother "checked in" to rehab on Facebook. The same rehab that told her to hand over her smartphone. The dumbass was smart enough to steal my phone and dumb enough to get it confiscated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20636) - you deserved it (1680)
On 01/29/2013 at 10:18pm - health - by motherless - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23765) - you deserved it (2456)
On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, a cyclone hit my city. Though everywhere else is flooding, my house is fine. Well, that was until the toilet decided to overflow and regurgitate the entire town's sewerage. So now my only bathroom is covered in sewage, and I can't go anywhere else because of the flooding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20855) - you deserved it (1155)
On 01/27/2013 at 6:47pm - health - by shitday - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was on a ladder at work, fetching some stock from one of the storage shelves. Some teenage kid thought it would be fucking hilarious to grab the ladder and violently shake it. He hadn't bet on me being startled enough to fall off and fracture my elbow on the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27839) - you deserved it (1766)
On 01/27/2013 at 4:59pm - health - by fucking teen cunts (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I heard an owl near my house. I got excited, as they are not common in the area, and I listened intently to try and locate the source of the sound. After a few minutes, I realized I was not listening to an owl, but to my mother's sex noises. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37488) - you deserved it (3959)
On 01/26/2013 at 6:50pm - intimacy - by movingout - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I came home to find two letters from a publishing house that I'd submitted my manuscript to. The first was congratulatory, stating that my book had been accepted for publishing. The second was apologetic, stating that the first letter had been intended for someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26572) - you deserved it (1241)
On 01/26/2013 at 1:14am - work - by strugglingartist (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boss put me on suspension for violating company policy by having non-work related mail in my inbox. They were spam emails. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22806) - you deserved it (1293)
On 01/25/2013 at 8:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was suffering from an asthma attack, so I grabbed my inhaler and took a puff. This was probably very disturbing for the earwig which had somehow made my puffer its home, as I discovered when it shot into my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24383) - you deserved it (2017)
On 01/25/2013 at 1:30am - health - by asthmattack (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I led a class of grade-two pupils on an excursion to the zoo. When we went to see the lions I was put in a position where I had to explain to seven and eight year olds why one lion was "bouncing" on top of the other one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24305) - you deserved it (1900)
On 01/25/2013 at 12:25am - kids - by teacher - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7767) - you deserved it (25005)
On 01/24/2013 at 2:53pm - misc - by idiot (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Friday 24 May 2013
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