Today, I went shopping with my two-year-old nephew. He threw a tantrum in the middle of the store because I would not show him my "boobies". A man came up to us and said I should do what my nephew wanted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28266) - you deserved it (3116)
On 02/17/2013 at 3:02am - kids - by Lesser (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after explaining to my four-year-old why our new puppy was peeing on things to mark his territory, my son decided to follow suit and pee all over our house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19814) - you deserved it (4089)
On 02/16/2013 at 9:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23484) - you deserved it (4933)
On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia
Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21840) - you deserved it (2984)
On 02/16/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by howannoying - Australia (Victoria)
Today, at a mixed-family game of rugby, my dad resorted to calling me a "goddamned accident" and eventually body-slamming me, just so I'd stop playing long enough for his team to score. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22052) - you deserved it (2100)
On 02/08/2013 at 8:53pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I had drinks at a friend's house before going out to a concert. I still had a bottle of beer left, so I brought it along with me. I got kicked out five minutes into the show for bringing my own drink, which is apparently against the rules. I paid $75 to get kicked out over a $3 drink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7910) - you deserved it (37334)
On 02/07/2013 at 12:11pm - misc - by loquacious shit stain (woman) - Australia
Today, a tenant in my apartment block told me about a nice shady place behind our building where he often goes to relax. Curious, I went looking for it. It was a quiet and secluded courtyard. At least until a man came out of nowhere waving a hammer in my face, screaming in a foreign language. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18012) - you deserved it (1784)
On 02/06/2013 at 6:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I hired out a motel room so I could stay there by myself and lie to my mother and grandmother about having friends. This is the third time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25973) - you deserved it (12118)
On 02/04/2013 at 2:45am - love - by lonelyloser - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my girlfriend asked me if she looked fat in her new pair of jeans. Knowing I was probably about two seconds away from all hell breaking loose, I instinctively tried to save my game, before remembering I wasn't playing a video game. I really need to get a life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8610) - you deserved it (19120)
On 02/03/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia
Today, I got so lonely I decided to make sock puppets and play with them. I played for four hours straight, only to be interrupted by a phone call. I didn't answer because my sock puppets were "on a date" and I didn't want to stop playing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25421) - you deserved it (14161)
On 02/02/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by ineedalife (woman) - Australia
Today, a male employee at a shoe shop helped me try on shoes. Once I found a pair, I went to pay for them. I was telling the cashier about how great of an employee he was when she told me there were no male employees. A guy with a foot fetish helped me find shoes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31064) - you deserved it (2887)
On 02/02/2013 at 6:21am - misc - by footfetish - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my grandmother walked in on me watching porn on my computer. She looked at the woman on the screen and said, "I used to have tits like that, but look what having 7 kids did to them." Now I'm scarred for life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16463) - you deserved it (24087)
On 02/01/2013 at 6:05am - intimacy - by Master Debater (man) - Australia
Today, most of my neighbours came to my house in an angry mob to complain about my dog barking. I don't have a dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23782) - you deserved it (1623)
On 02/01/2013 at 1:09am - animals - by Angry Mob - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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