Today, I cleaned the toilet so vigorously that I snapped the handle of the brush. I laughed and told the rest of my family. Instead of joining in on the hilarity, my mother screamed, "We have had that toilet brush for twenty-six years!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19564) - you deserved it (1614)
On 08/01/2012 at 3:59am - misc - by SLAB_GIRL15 - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my OCD boyfriend stopped mid-way through sex just to crack all ten of his knuckles after accidentally cracking one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19699) - you deserved it (3462)
On 07/29/2012 at 9:34am - intimacy - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17020) - you deserved it (2460)
On 07/29/2012 at 4:11am - kids - by ellieowenie - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was speaking to my mother on the phone, when she mentioned that my dad had surprised her last week with a pearl necklace. Before I could quite grasp what was going on, I'd popped a boner and visualised the scene. What the hell is wrong with me? FML
I agree, your life sucks (7954) - you deserved it (27235)
On 07/27/2012 at 8:30pm - intimacy - by clayton (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was mugged. Not for a laptop, cell phone or money, but for the cupcake I was eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19199) - you deserved it (1510)
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've been diagnosed with gestational diabetes. Despite all my attempts to explain that he's wrong, he is totally convinced that my genitals have diabetes. This guy is going to be such a great father to our kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13672) - you deserved it (4213)
On 07/15/2012 at 5:52pm - health - by Tori (woman) - Australia
Today, a lady threw a coke bottle at my head because she had a non-winning lottery ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19049) - you deserved it (1262)
On 07/15/2012 at 1:51am - work - by kerensa (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my mother screamed at my brother for ages for playing a Nicki Minaj music video. She said it's "terrible, demonic garbage" that'll get us "spitroasted in Hell". I don't even disagree with the first part, but she does this kind of thing every single day when I get home from my night job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13013) - you deserved it (1609)
On 07/14/2012 at 8:22pm - misc - by arghgffhdfg (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, for my birthday, my family offered to take one of my friends to the movies with me. I had to pay a random person in my class to pose as a friend of mine, so that I wouldn't look pathetic in front of my parents. She forgot my name three times. They didn't buy it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12544) - you deserved it (13828)
On 07/09/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by Nofriends (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20684) - you deserved it (2961)
On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia
Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22136) - you deserved it (2142)
On 07/08/2012 at 7:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to make me dinner surrounded by a candlelight setting. By the time I got home, we had 7 firefighters surrounding our house. Turns out one of the candles fell on the carpet and lit up the curtain as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14798) - you deserved it (1260)
On 07/07/2012 at 9:42pm - misc - by mynameiscrazy - Australia
Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15881) - you deserved it (1399)
On 07/06/2012 at 1:11pm - misc - by Julie is in pain (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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