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Today, I decided to wake my fiancé up by giving him a blow-job. When he finally started to wake up he called me by his ex's name. FML

#14791115
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39330) - you deserved it (5700)

On 01/31/2011 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by MollyMadamme -

Today, my boyfriend told me the thing that gets him really horny. Apple sauce. FML

#14786538
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29663) - you deserved it (5191)

On 01/31/2011 at 10:47am - intimacy - by Username -

Today, the company I applied for called up congratulating me in getting the job. I was ecstatic. Quickly enough I texted a few mates that I'd got the job. Twenty minutes later they called again saying the trainee had accidentally called the wrong applicant. FML

#14786523
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29025) - you deserved it (2553)

On 01/31/2011 at 10:44am - misc - by kkkk -

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she met someone else on World of Warcraft. I've been paying for her subscription. FML

#14783005
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35048) - you deserved it (13710)

On 01/31/2011 at 12:58am - love - by Thanh Quang -

Today, I was attacked by my dad because I got my hair dyed and he thought I was a robber. FML

#14782840
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25577) - you deserved it (7309)

On 01/31/2011 at 12:47am - misc - by f -

Today, my fiancé and I just moved into our first apartment together. Our neighbor across the hall? My ex-boyfriend who I've had to file three separate restraining orders on. FML

#14740346
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31902) - you deserved it (4977)

On 01/28/2011 at 4:12am - love - by ashdk -

Today, I wrote a poem and was very proud of it. I showed it to my mom. After reading it, her response was, "What is this shit?" FML

#14739407
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25307) - you deserved it (5187)

On 01/28/2011 at 1:21am - misc - by snappyPi -

Today, the guy who sits next to me in my psychology class openly admitted to torturing animals as a child. It's going to be a long semester. FML

#14726296
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26944) - you deserved it (2514)

On 01/26/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Username -

Today, my 4 year old cousin is staying overnight. Every time I fall asleep he wakes me up to tell me I fell asleep. FML

#14716778
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33083) - you deserved it (3390)

On 01/26/2011 at 2:48am - kids - by Braelynn -

Today, I spent all day preparing a big, elaborate Italian dinner for my boyfriend, who recently discovered he was part Italian. He came home, turned up his nose and said "I was in the mood for Chinese". FML

#14712877
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24230) - you deserved it (3540)

On 01/25/2011 at 7:54pm - misc - by bluediva24 -

Today, I was watching TV in my living room while my wife was cooking. I began to smell the aroma of her potato soup, which made me hungry. Suddenly, I realized that the smell wasn't my wife's cooking but was in fact my body odor. FML

#14708501
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6810) - you deserved it (37502)

On 01/25/2011 at 10:25am - misc - by jroberts -

Today, I found my electric globe. It asks you where a state, country or city is and you would have to find it and click on it with the pen. I also found out that my parents would sneak into my room at night, take it and play 'strip-globe'. FML

#14708119
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23829) - you deserved it (2575)

On 01/25/2011 at 9:10am - intimacy - by Charlotte -

Today, during PE I got hit in the face with the ball. Everyone cheered because we got 5 extra points. No one asked if I was okay. FML

#14706405
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23108) - you deserved it (3763)

On 01/25/2011 at 3:27am - misc - by Jim -



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