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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I figured out why the man I've been seeing for 3 years hasn't asked for my hand in marriage. His current wife called me and told me all about it. FML

#14399805
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25056) - you deserved it (2821)

On 12/30/2010 at 7:45pm - love - by 3yrneveragainn -

Today, my boyfriend asked me to 'spice things up in the bedroom'. When I asked how, he said I could try wearing a paper bag over my head. FML

#14393948
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29261) - you deserved it (4392)

On 12/30/2010 at 9:09am - intimacy - by georgiahick -

Today, I told my best friend that I liked him and have liked him for a long time. His response was "That's cool. So, when did you get a cat?" FML

#14392477
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21339) - you deserved it (3173)

On 12/30/2010 at 4:39am - love - by thatsucks -

Today, I was delivering pizza in the rain. A woman answered the door, saw me soaking wet and said, "Wow this rain is terrible, it must be horrible to be out delivering in it." She then tipped me 21 cents. FML

#14391490
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20338) - you deserved it (2498)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:48am - work - by ronniewciv -

Today, my girlfriend told me that her parents have a bet going on when we are going to break up. FML

#14381154
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20707) - you deserved it (2635)

On 12/29/2010 at 10:24am - love - by ... -

Today, an antiques dealer made a joke about chopping off and buying my deformed left hand. FML

#14377623
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22599) - you deserved it (2008)

On 12/29/2010 at 1:50am - misc - by Shepaintsmusic -

Today, I found out that my parents didn't come to my wedding not because they couldn't make it, but rather that my younger brother didn't want to go. FML

#14365094
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25739) - you deserved it (1892)

On 12/28/2010 at 1:54am - misc - by SharpeOne -

Today, I took my kids to the doctor. In the waiting room, a six year old boy walked up to me, punched me in the crotch, and ran away with my glasses. When the kid's parents made him give me my glasses back, he spat on them. FML

#14354901
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24446) - you deserved it (2168)

On 12/27/2010 at 6:29am - kids - by DeadDude -

Today, I was told by my mom that I'm a terrible person because I won't help my brother get a girlfriend. He's gay, but won't tell her because he thinks it's hilarious when she yells at me. FML

#14353774
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27503) - you deserved it (3427)

On 12/27/2010 at 3:39am - misc - by Username -

Today, after finally dropping my weight from an overweight 200 to a slim 135, my skin is now loose everywhere, and stretches about two inches out on my stomach. FML

#14350386
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25015) - you deserved it (4944)

On 12/26/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by cloud7 -

Today, I woke up to all 4 of my wheels stolen from my car. The thieves were kind enough to leave the car resting on wooden blocks and bricks. FML

#14347909
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17257) - you deserved it (1733)

On 12/26/2010 at 6:36pm - misc - by JennieA -

Today, I asked a girl I liked what she was doing tomorrow night. She replied, "Cleaning, so nothing really." I then asked her out to dinner. She declined. FML

#14308182
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20492) - you deserved it (3166)

On 12/23/2010 at 5:50am - love - by Username -

Today, I saw my first boobs ever, at 18, volunteering at a retirement home. FML

#14306986
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32600) - you deserved it (6432)

On 12/23/2010 at 3:18am - intimacy - by David H. -



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