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Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

#15833093
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58794) - you deserved it (4413)

On 04/18/2011 at 11:09am - work - by davka -

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's house. I had a shower while he went downstairs. As I went to say goodbye to him, his mother muttered "slut" while pouring him orange juice. FML

#15831964
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38481) - you deserved it (20705)

On 04/18/2011 at 5:34am - intimacy - by sllaggy -

Today, my boyfriend punched a hole in a door. This is on top of the broken handle, cracked sink top, dented fridge, and other holes in the wall he has also made. We are 4 months into our year lease. I don't think we are getting our $720 deposit back. FML

#15781081
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24308) - you deserved it (17682)

On 04/14/2011 at 2:59am - money - by Username -

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46774) - you deserved it (7051)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, I got attacked by my own dog. I don't know what will be harder, telling everyone how my dog thought I was a robber or explaining to them why a 25 year old man owns a poodle. FML

#15766373
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24405) - you deserved it (15628)

On 04/13/2011 at 3:05am - animals - by Username -

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18855) - you deserved it (38238)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, while at an important meeting at work, I got to watch helplessly as a police officer gave me a parking meter ticket. Added to that my boss chewed me out for "never paying attention and staring out the window during meetings". FML

#15756717
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22464) - you deserved it (10311)

On 04/12/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by Kevin -

Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML

#15752266
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34730) - you deserved it (7833)

On 04/12/2011 at 6:09am - misc - by anon -

Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time. She still hasn't got the hint. FML

#15749336
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35093) - you deserved it (11563)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:08am - love - by husks -

Today, the maintenance man 'fixed' a leak in my apartment by flooding the place. FML

#15744069
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23747) - you deserved it (2348)

On 04/11/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by sproket -

Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML

#15733028
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27225) - you deserved it (7820)

On 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by anonymous -

Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML

#15693187
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43319) - you deserved it (3674)

On 04/08/2011 at 11:03am - love - by hopeless -

Today, I stepped outside my office building for a smoke break and I witnessed a mugging so I ran over to stop it. I succeeded in getting mugged instead of the original target. I then couldn't get into my building until a coworker left an hour later. My boss was mad and still doesn't believe me. FML

#15692090
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28116) - you deserved it (5240)

On 04/08/2011 at 7:58am - work - by Fired -



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