Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from

Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML

#15442986
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39321) - you deserved it (3499)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:56am - misc - by anon -

Today, my friends thought it would be hilarious to show me Marley and Me the day right after I had to put down my dog. I had my dog for 11 years. FML

#15437013
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53778) - you deserved it (3762)

On 03/22/2011 at 8:18pm - animals - by awesome -

Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML

#15430583
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21515) - you deserved it (11883)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:39am - health - by Maddie -

Today, my neighbors got a rooster. FML

#15427360
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57371) - you deserved it (6220)

On 03/22/2011 at 3:23am - animals - by negin -

Today, I found out why my parents forgot my birthday. Facebook didn't remind them. FML

#15414208
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37967) - you deserved it (4256)

On 03/21/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by Unlovedchild -

Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML

#15410065
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32832) - you deserved it (3696)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:02am - love - by lily389 -

Today, I finally got the courage to say to my boyfriend that I feel invisible and ignored. To this he said 'You aren't invisible, I mean, look at that nose.' FML

#15365098
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36491) - you deserved it (7166)

On 03/18/2011 at 8:36am - love - by anon -

Today, I swerved out of the way to avoid hitting a squirrel, and in the process hit another squirrel. FML

#15364776
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32858) - you deserved it (9717)

On 03/18/2011 at 7:28am - misc - by karmavictim -

Today, I went to the airport to start the amazing 3 week vacation in Costa Rica that I've been saving for and planning for more than a year. They wouldn't let me on the plane because my passport expires in less than 6 months. FML

#15363711
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35292) - you deserved it (12487)

On 03/18/2011 at 3:35am - misc - by anonymous -

Today, I was moving to the city with all my belongings when the trailer came unhitched, breaking the chains on my dad's homemade trailer. I then watched as the trailer narrowly missed a guardrail, went down a hill and into a river. My dad still won't admit he didn't latch the hitch. FML

#15350791
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29221) - you deserved it (3869)

On 03/17/2011 at 11:11am - misc - by johnsj8 -

Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML

#15345509
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31915) - you deserved it (4768)

On 03/17/2011 at 12:04am - kids - by Username -

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41768) - you deserved it (11210)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal, my son had pooped in the school yard then gave the teacher a ziploc bag and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

#15328400
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36428) - you deserved it (5573)

On 03/15/2011 at 10:05pm - kids - by anonymous -



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: