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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I Have A New Boss. She Claims To Be A Professional Angry Birds Player. FML

#15884668
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30926) - you deserved it (4901)

On 04/22/2011 at 10:42am - work - by Username -

Today, mah mom confused me with mah dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

#15883377
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83393) - you deserved it (6245)

On 04/22/2011 at 7:11am - intimacy - by Damian -

Today, I was on te train to work. I was up late looool te nigt before, causing me to doze off. Wen I woke up, I was at ma station. I stood up, went to walk out of te door an fell flat on ma face on a platform full of people. Someone ad tid ma soelaces togeter. FML

#15883320
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28771) - you deserved it (6398)

On 04/22/2011 at 6:50am - work - by anonymous -

Today, mah girlfriend told me she is only going out with me because I look like the person she really wants to go out with. FML

#15881696
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36786) - you deserved it (3260)

On 04/22/2011 at 1:53am - love - by AngryBirdman -

Today, I Watched A YouTube Video At Work Because I Was Bored. I Forgot I Was On A Conference Call And My Computer's Desktop Was Shared With 15 Other People. No One Said Anything Till It Ended. FML

#15881339
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8207) - you deserved it (38800)

On 04/22/2011 at 1:20am - work - by anonymous -

Taday while having sex with mah grlfriend, she tells me that the flab on mah stomach does not turn her on, an stops in the middle of it. Therefore, until mah diet is over, guess who doesn't get any. FML

#15881226
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31670) - you deserved it (20859)

On 04/22/2011 at 1:08am - intimacy - by HotACE -

Today, I askd my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He lookd at me and said "No, but apparently u are." real FML

#15871718
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34178) - you deserved it (9619)

On 04/21/2011 at 9:55am - love - by Username -

Today, I noticed this guy crying in the park. I went up to him to see what was wrong. Apparently his girlfriend broke up with him, and he also said he wanted to kill himself. My first response was "Don't, you'll regret it later in life". FML

#15869241
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30738) - you deserved it (12321)

On 04/21/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by alopez1994 -

Today, at work, I spent half an hour trying to convince an elderly customer that no, I wasn't a messenger sent by the devil to take her soul to hell . FML

#15857597
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34401) - you deserved it (3295)

On 04/20/2011 at 10:15am - work - by rawr -

2day I Went Shopping 4 A Nice Outfit To Wear 4 A Job Interview. A Fake Job Interview. One That I Just Made Up So My Mother Would Get Off My Case About Finding A Job. I Don't Know Which Is Sadder , The Fact That I Can't Get A Job , Or That My Mother Actually Believd Me About The Interview. FML

#15855932
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9549) - you deserved it (35171)

On 04/20/2011 at 5:27am - work - by oh hey there -

Today , I decided to start mah exercise video routine. It's an African dance workout DVD. Just as I felt confident an motivated about getting in shape , I realized that mah window was wide open an mah neighbors were getting a front row seat to me waving mah arms in the air like an idiot. FML

#15855723
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13984) - you deserved it (22581)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:27am - misc - by JenniWearsPrada -

Today , I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no looool ideahy , but I replied "a bottle of milk please."

#15855605
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19207) - you deserved it (29648)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I told my son tat is grade r dropping an is beavior is getting out of and. To wic e replied, "Yea, so is your wiegt." FML

#15843459
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38695) - you deserved it (15873)

On 04/19/2011 at 2:38am - kids - by randa -



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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